MnM's


Growing up in a strict religious family has it's moments. Some good, some bad, some moments turn to memories that you never forget. If you were not among the fortunate ones who grew up in a large family, along with a mess of cousins, you missed out. There was never an end to the trouble we could get into. All to many times the trouble we got into came from just wanting to have fun. That's what we lived for. We went looking for fun.....and candy. A day filled with it just couldn't happen unless there was candy involved. My favorite at the time was MnM's. It seems I would do anything for a bag of those melt in your mouth not in your hand little red and green, yellow and brown piecec of heaven. Yum.

At six years old I was known as one of the best salesman in the neighborhood. Among my family I was compared to the greatest salesman that ever walked this green earth. His salesmanship was known throughout the states of New Mexico, Colorado and Wyoming. Every one wanted to buy his green chile. People could have bought it anywhere but because of his ability as a salesman his chile was sought after. That man was my grandfather. Even though he died when I was very young it seems his ability must have rubbed off on me.

Waking up that warm sunny summer day I had no idea it was going to be one of the best days of my sales career as an independant salesman. I don't know what it was that compelled me back then, but I just had to be selling something. I would attempt to sell anything I could find. Maybe it was that I just had a craving for MnM's. Of one thing I am sure of, that day started out like any other day. The years have come and gone since that day but I am sure it started with mom walking through the house yelling at us to get up before she had to come in and drag us out of bed.

"It's only five in the morning, how come we have to get up so early?" I would yell out from under my covers hoping she didn't hear me.

"Because I said so" She yelled back........That was her answer for everything.

"That's not an answer" I'd yell back.

I might point out I was somewhat of a rebel back then. I walked around with twisted ears and a bruised butt to prove it. Have you ever been drug around the house by the ears?? Yeah me to.

"Do I have to make my bed today" I hollered out.

"What do you think?" She yelled back as she struggled to drag my lazy brother out of bed.

"No?" I sheepishly ask hoping I could leave it today so I could get out and play.

"Make your bed right now buster" The sound of her voice told me it would be in my best interest to shut up.

When mom started speaking in tongues we knew it was time to quit screwing around and get busy, and we better hurry. When her tongue speaking turned to spanish we knew we were in for a beating if we didn't get on the stick. Us kids could swear she didn't wear shoes cause she thought she looked good in them. They were used as flying projectiles. When she bent down,,,,,,and let me tell you Wyatt Earp wouldn't stand a chance against her,,,,,,, we barely had time to open our mouths to scream out in holy terror before she beaned one of us with her shoes. Her shoes were weapons of mass destruction. They were even equipped with a device that could seek out kids who were screaming out in holy terror. Neighborhood kids and our cousins learned to keep quite while hiding in fear that one of her shoes would find them. Her shoes were designed with a tracking device. Often they came out of nowhere. Chasing us through the house with the tracking device turned on they could turn corners quicker than we could. No hiding place was safe from moms shoes. They even had long range sensors. Hiding on top of the garage wasn't safe. Those shoes were well trained. We soon found out that burying the shoes, or pots and pans for that matter in the back yard (that's a different story) did no good cause she had a secret stash of shoes she kept hidden away.

Mom had not started speaking in tounges yet so we were safe as long as we done what we were told.

My crazy brother, the one who buried pots and pans in the back yard, had to ask her, "What stick mom?"

The look in her eye told us our lives were over if we opened our mouths once more. I honestly don't know how she survived us kids. By the time we screwed around enough in our bed rooms we had to eat our oat meal cold. And lumpy. You ever have cold lumpy oat meal without sugar? Sometimes we got a piece of toast to go with our cold lumpy sugerless oatmeal.

"Mom, how come we never have captain crunch?" I ask

"Shut up and eat" she said as she gave me one of her looks.

So with both feet firmly plantd on the floor in case I had to make a run for the door I ate my cold lumpy oatmeal.

Well dang I'm getting side tracked. You all still with me? Good.

This paticular day was going to involve our favorite game,,,,,,,,playing, Little did I know that my salesmanship abilities were going to be tested that day. While making my rounds through the neighborhood looking for any kind of trouble I could get into I came across a stack of calendars. They were right there for the taking. Brand new, still wrapped up. Sitting right there on the trash lid behind the neighborhood grocery store. So one of those crazy hair brained ideas came to mind. It was my hair brained idea. I thougt of it all by myself. My cousins weren't even around so I decided to carry out my plan and if it worked I would have money for MnM's. I didn't even have to share with my cousins.

So calendars in hand I set out to put my plan into action. The first door I knocked on got me a flat out no. Why not I thought to myself as I walked down the steps and on to my next door. Everyone needs a calander and here I am offering them one and they don't even have to go to town today to get one. After about the fourth door I thought maybe a change in sales pitches might work. So at the next door:

"Could I interest you in one of these fine calendars with the pictures of wildlife and nature"? I asked the next lady I came across.

"How much"? Sha asked.

"A dime" I replied.

I walked away thinking to myself, "I can't believe it, I have a dime"

Hey a dime back in the sixties to a six year old kid was alot of money, try buying a bag of MnM's with a dime today.

I think back on that day and wonder if the people who bought those calendars actually knew they were a year old, yup, I sold them year old calendars that day and by the time the day was done I had five bucks. All the MnM's I wanted. No wonder I was compared to the greatest salesman who ever lived.

Oh one more thing. This was suppose to be about growing up in a strict religious family, but like always I got a bit side tracked.

THANKS

the very strange thing is, that i'm eating peanut dark chocolate M&M's now, as i read this....and they're wonderful.

Thanks for reading and your thoughts.

I keep a supply of them around the house. I lean more towards the almond MnM's these days, yum