But can a person ever really know??

I think it depends wat their reasons r for thinkin it....maybe u have done summit innocent that may have looked bad to the other person, in that case, i would understand why they thought it, and just reassure them.
If we love someone, why would we pass them off at the first instance of insecurity? Im a great believer in communicating worries or concerns in a relationship.

As i said, if it happened regularly, thats different, but if there has been genuine reason for that doubt, i wouldnt make the other person feel bad, but rather talk it thru with them.

Lisa, I think the word 'accuse' is what's throwing me off.

If the person had a reason to think that I might have been unfaithful and wanted to ask me about it, talk it through, or some other less offensive action, I'd be okay with that.

But the word accuse is so final and judgemental that I'd automatically be on the defensive, hurt, and insulted.

Yeh, i agree Lisa, the word "accuse" is a strong word, but lets look at 2 diff scenarios...

Woman on way to the store, spots her SO in a nearby eatery hugging another woman. (happens to be the sis she has never met)

She waits till hes home, and then says .......
1.) "You son of a ****, ur cheating arent u!!"

Or

2.) "I saw u hugging another woman, made me feel insecure, who was she?"

Both of them sound completely diff, but insinuate the same thing....that there is a worry of infidelity.

Concerns usually come from the fear of being decieved. To be overly fearful is not healthy.

if you don't trust the person you're with, there's no reason to stay with them. and if the person you're with doesn't trust you when you've given them no reason for distrust, why would you spend time trying to convince them?
i don't tolerate infidelity and would never cheat. anyone who knows me knows this about me. if a girl has doubts about me then she needs to find someone else.

. . .

I agree that a relationship is nothing without trust, but trust is built over time and earned. Wat if ur SO had a good reason for thinking u were cheating? (see my example above) and how can u guarantee that u arent the kind to stray?? just by saying?

Ppl in relationships, occasionally, may require a bit of re-assurance depending on wat situations arise. It would be unrealistic to think that our word is ALWAYS good enough when emotions r involved.

I'm not the cheater type, so I'd reverse the question on them. Why are you asking? What have I done to make you feel this way? I'd also talk it through, b/c things like this build inside if not let out, and end up pretty messy... I do hope it never happens to me again (My ex wife cheated on me), because it hurt me bad... I know if i like/love someone, I wouldn't put them through what I had been put through...

Yes I was angry. One of the reason my ex is my ex. Her insecurities got to be to much to handle.

good point.. and Ive found if they are the guilty party they try to make like you are.. twisted lies.....to take the focus off reality

you must know me better than i do myself.
short of being drugged and forced to have sex with someone, i can truthfully say that i am not the kind to cheat. that is my word and it's something that i've been taught to stand behind. i hold the sanctity of a relationship in very high regard and i wouldn't do anything to ruin that. i know that you don't know me and therefore have no reason to believe me. thankfully, you are not my SO and therefore, i don't care if you believe me or not.

as for people needing reassurance, i get it. but i won't tolerate being accused of something that i didn't or wouldn't do.

. . .

i look at it like this, if there question you,

Maybe you should put them on the hot seat,