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Topic: What's your opinion regarding
Citizen_Joe's photo
Fri 02/27/09 07:55 AM

living together before marriage?


Excellent idea. Prospects are low though. I have no one in mind for that.


Do you think if more people did this it would cut back on the high rate of divorce?


I think being grateful for each other is a good sign of a healthy marriage. I don't know that living together does any more than create a trial marriage senario. Since my last marriage, I require a minimum of 4 seasons of living in sin.


justme659's photo
Fri 02/27/09 09:00 AM

But dont you feel its easier to just pack up and leave if things dont go right? Instead of getting married and working to make it last?


Yes I do feel it is easier to do that, but doesn't that tell you a lot about their character if they are willing to give up that easy when times get tough? A marriage certificate isn't going to guarantee that they are still going to tough it out.


I was only talking about me. I cant say if the other person is going to tough it out like I would.( I am stubborn ) I would hope, for a second marriage for me, I would pick a better partner than I did the first time around, having learned a thing or two. A marriage certificate would make me think twice or three times before making the decision to leave over some small mistake or percieved injustice. Thats where the grow together and learn together comes in to play. On the other hand there is a point where if any abuse crops up, I am out of there quicker than lighting. Been there done that, not ever to go there again.

Lynn89's photo
Mon 03/02/09 10:45 AM
I like your answer. And....the older you get the more sense it makes to have an exclusive relationship and each have their own residence. Monogamy is important, but so is privacy and ownership. But in answer to the initial question. I think living together is important if you plan a "lifetime" together. The older you get the more you know that's just a roll of the dice anyway--but it's suicide when you're young, if you don't at least live with them for awhile before you marry them!

lilith401's photo
Mon 03/02/09 10:58 AM
Marriage tends to reap complacency...

But I say living together before sex is a good idea because there tends to be more more actual intimacy with couples before they marry. Not to mention you can iron out all those little quirks, or at least acclimate to them.

Seakolony's photo
Mon 03/02/09 11:00 AM

living together before marriage?

Do you think if more people did this it would cut back on the high rate of divorce?


I am all for it and do feel that it would lessen your chances of divorce.

Actually its quite the opposite, more couples that lived together before marriage get divorced over those that did not!!

no photo
Mon 03/02/09 11:04 AM
I think people shack up too soon before they even know the person.

Lynann's photo
Mon 03/02/09 11:05 AM
I don't have any opinions about whether others choose to live together or not.

For me?

I cannot see myself ever married again and I know I would approach living together very carefully.

Children are no longer a factor for me. However I think if they were I might be more marriage minded.

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