Yesterday I was buying 2 large bags of Purina dog chow at Wal-Mart, for my dogs. I was about to
check out when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

(What did she think, that I had an elephant?)

Since I had little else to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again, although I
probably shouldn't because I ended up in the hospital last time.

On the bright side though, I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of every hole in my body
and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one
or two every time you feel hungry, that the food is nutritionally complete; so I was going to try it again.

(I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was enthralled with my
story by now.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food had poisoned me. I told her no; I had stopped in the
middle of the parking lot to lick my butt and a car hit me.

priceless!!!

That is wrong on so many levels. LOL!!!!!!!!

I hate that when it happens...

she was hitting on you man.