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Topic: are there any right or good answers.
Shagwell's photo
Tue 01/20/09 09:08 PM

Generally I think sometimes it is just a distance thing. It sounds all romantic and so forth to start but when people start thinking about what it really would mean to pick up and move away from everything and everyone they know they get cold feet.



That's a big step for some! flowerforyou

Gams's photo
Tue 01/20/09 09:25 PM
I'm thinking the distance quote has merit.
Absence or distance does not necessarily equate to making the heart grow fonder.

Distance is fine as long as there is a meeting date to aspire toward. If all it is or will ever be is one email after another things will usually and finally relent to reality.

People need respect appreciation and physical affection. Just some thoughts. Good luck :)


scoundrel's photo
Tue 01/20/09 09:37 PM
Dear John:

This is just the way it is. Months is too long for a woman to be without arms to hold her, and hearts to beat in the same breath.
Nature has its ways.
Life takes over, beyond the control of logic and reasoning. Perhaps sating primitive/base needs is too unrefined for a reason to end love letters and building castles in the sky together. But it happens.

It's either that, or play you for a sucker while the other stuff goes on.

Unless you made it clear that it's fine if the other stuff goes on, because it will, and when the two of you really can be permanently together then the other stuff just isn't there anymore.

Citizen_Joe's photo
Tue 01/20/09 10:41 PM

thank you for reading so far, do you have any ideas or answers which might help. : )

thank you.


Acceptance is a good word to learn and embrace.

Want2B5ft's photo
Wed 01/21/09 12:09 AM


I once had a friend who grew to be very close to me. Once when we were sitting at the edge of a swimming pool, she filled the palm of her hand with some water and held it before me, and said this: "You see this water carefully contained on my hand? It symbolizes Love.

" This was how I saw it: As long as you keep your hand caringly open and allow it to remain there, it will always be there. However, if you attempt to close your fingers round it and try to posses it, it will spill through the first cracks it finds.

This is the greatest mistake that people do when they meet love ... They try to posses it, they demand, they expect ... And just like the water spilling out of your hand, love will retrieve from you. For love is meant to be free,

You can not change its nature.

If there are people you love, allow them to be free beings.

Give and don't expect. Advise, but don't order. Ask, but never demand.
It might sound simple, but it is a lesson that may take a lifetime to truly practice.

It is the secret to true love.To truly practice it, you must sincerely feel no expectations from those who you love, and yet an unconditional caring."

Passing thought ... Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take; but by the moments that take our breath away.




There is a lot to think about in this post. I am gonna cut/paste this so I can look at it again later.

keepthehope's photo
Wed 01/21/09 02:05 AM
Maybe they don't want to be so deep in the first couple of weeks. Lighten that up a little and see what happens.

I had a couple of guys do that to me, and I didn't care to have them be so pushy. Not that that is what you are doing, but it may seem like that to them.

Take it easy at first.

DragonFlyTat's photo
Wed 01/21/09 05:41 AM
It's called the honeymoon stage. When you first meet someone and you think that they are great. You get to know one another and you start to see the differences are to vast and start to back away.

prisoner's photo
Wed 01/21/09 05:46 AM
:smile: it's only "the cyber world"...it isn't important at all...be seeing you

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