I was watching the Tyra Banks' show today and a question came to mind from people I've talked to recently combined with the topic of the show.

Me personally, I do want to be married one day but I'm in no big hurry. I'm turning 25 this year and feel I'm coming into my prime, I really feel no rush and as long as I'm married in the next 10 years I'll cope...lol.

I noticed single men who hang out with married friends seem to be in a huge hurry to wed. I have married friends too, both happily and not so happily. The not so happily is why I'm in no hurry...lol. I DO want to be with someone who knows they do want to get married one day, but is it just me or does the smell of desperation completely turn you away?

Why does it seem so hard to find someone who has a middle ground? Someone who does want to be married one day, but not in a rush? They're either wanting to marry you practically before your first kiss, or completely commitment phobic. What gives?

Any opinions?

I think it's just that at this age, people are really confused about what they want. A lot of our parents were married in their 20's, so some feel the need to do the same. Others subconsciously repel the notion of being tied down so soon into their adult lives.

My roommates are engaged. She wants to rush the wedding and I can tell he (being married once already himself) does not want to hurry things along. He keeps telling her that it costs a lot of money and is a lot of pressure to get a wedding of the caliber she wishes to occur...and she has taken to buying a ton of scratch off tickets hoping to strike it rich to afford it. All of it has convinced me I am in no rush what so ever to get married.

I'm single with married friends (not that many are married any more) & I have no desire to marry again & I also have friends that are single & have no desire to get married.

I think that could be it. I think guys all assume every woman is going to want to hurry them down the isle if they admit to wanting to one day be married. I'm okay without a piece of paper, I mean... its just the government's way of being involved in our relationships anyway. Well I think I'll let this topic stew more interest while I go work out.

To each marriage means something different and if your lucky to find somebody that looks at it the same way you do then your bless.

To many marry because your suppose to, to many marry because they don't want to be alone and to many marry with the thought "well if it doesn't work we will just divorce"

To each is own.

i don't think you can search for someone in a specific category as in

1. someone who wants a girlfriend, and would possibly get married later on in time.

to me marriage has nothing to do with the minister saying you are now husband and wife.
to me thats some random guy telling me what i already know

if i found that special one, and knew it i don't think marriage would be on the forefront of my mind. no matter what age i am

I'm with Pats. I'm divorced, most of my friends are married, and I have no desire to ever be married again. I don't consider myself commitment-phobic -- I could make a commitment -- but I don't see "commitment" as synonymous with "marriage."

There are people out there looking for a serious relationship?

Men?

I don't believe it....surely you jest!

I really just want someone who wouldn't rule it out if it ever were to happen, but not seemingly on a deadline to get married like so many these days. When I was 16 I thought I wanted to be married by 25, but with it now being in my near future (and me being less idealistic than 16 year old me was) I don't really care about "marriage" as much as I do commitment.

Well, one anyway.

You are such a tease.

you certainly don't sound like a 16 year old, but by god you look like one


i know where your coming from, you should do what i do and set your self realistic targets, my target for marriage was and still is to be married before im 85 years old

I never actually said it was me.

(Nor did I say it wasn't.)

But your wording goes back to my whole point -- that a "serious relationship" doesn't necessarily imply "marriage," per se.

Sure, it COULD -- and there are people who want to be married. I realize this; although having been there myself, I'm at a loss to understand what the appeal of the whole thing is.

But I would be just as leery of someone wanting to rush into a "serious relationship" as I would be of someone wanting to rush into marriage. The only difference is that I would not be involved with someone who was absolutely intent on being married.

What bugs me on a site like this are the ones who email me and are talking about marriage within the first or second email. Talking about how much they want to find the one and want to settle down and get married. That reeks of desperation to me. Not the wanting to get married, but the need to tell someone all about it who you emailed for the first time.

if some one was so marriage oriented then that would put me off strait away. singmesweet

i wouldn't even talk about it on my profile

I would like to get married, but am in no rush. We will both still be together when we both are ready if it is ment to be. At least in my opinion.

But right i would like someone to be with, go through life with, and join my family (me and the little guy)...geeze its nice to dream I think its just hard for me because I'm so young and hook ups is all anyone remotely close to my age has on their mind.

Lexy you just proved why you are a tease.

You know you did, you knew I'd see it, and there ya go!

Yes, pretty much. If they're so into finding someone to get married to, they come off as just trying too hard.

i would rather had used the word

tapped in the head