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| Topic: Do I have the right to know | |
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If my ex lost her job and isnt working?
I recently got a letter from the daycare my girls were attending and there was an outstanding balance. I've gone back and forth with them and my ex that I am not supposed to be paying that bill. In the last on with the outstanding balance the director of the daycare wrote a note stating that she knows the girls havent been attending but the balance is still due. The last date on the letter was 10/20/08 now I'm taking that as my girls havent been there since then and my ex hasnt mentioned it to me. I never thought about it when I would pick them up that she always had them at home and I wasnt getting them from daycare. So hence my question do I have the right to know? I feel it involves the welfare of my girls and I should know. |
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You haven't known for 3 months...where ya' been DAD!
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If my ex lost her job and isnt working? I recently got a letter from the daycare my girls were attending and there was an outstanding balance. I've gone back and forth with them and my ex that I am not supposed to be paying that bill. In the last on with the outstanding balance the director of the daycare wrote a note stating that she knows the girls havent been attending but the balance is still due. The last date on the letter was 10/20/08 now I'm taking that as my girls havent been there since then and my ex hasnt mentioned it to me. I never thought about it when I would pick them up that she always had them at home and I wasnt getting them from daycare. So hence my question do I have the right to know? I feel it involves the welfare of my girls and I should know.  If it involves something you have to pay for then it involves you, otherwise it dont
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seeing as how you still actively participate in the lives of your girls ...I would say yes definitely..if you ex lost her job that directly affects the welfare of your girls and for that reason you have every right to know..it does not mean you should foot all the past due bills but for necessities you may need to step in and help for the sake of your girls...either way you have the right to know
If you pay child support and lost your job your ex would have the right to know that just the same as you have the right to know about her loss..it affects the welfare of the children |
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If you are paying child support and daycare payments are part of it, yes you have the right to know.
You also have the right to know if your ex isn't working as well since she may go back to the courts and ask for more child support now. |
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You haven't known for 3 months...where ya' been DAD! For your information I have my girls every weekend and I treasure every minute with them!! I dont have endless conversations with my ex about her life she has her own life and I stay out of it I was just wondering if I should be told if she lost her job or not! |
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If my ex lost her job and isnt working? I recently got a letter from the daycare my girls were attending and there was an outstanding balance. I've gone back and forth with them and my ex that I am not supposed to be paying that bill. In the last on with the outstanding balance the director of the daycare wrote a note stating that she knows the girls havent been attending but the balance is still due. The last date on the letter was 10/20/08 now I'm taking that as my girls havent been there since then and my ex hasnt mentioned it to me. I never thought about it when I would pick them up that she always had them at home and I wasnt getting them from daycare. So hence my question do I have the right to know? I feel it involves the welfare of my girls and I should know. If it involves something you have to pay for then it involves you, otherwise it dont Well no I'm not supposed to pay for daycare but they sent me that bill and thats why I think she isnt working. She hasnt said anything to me about it. |
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just a note:
since the ex is the primary caregiver her finances affect the welfare of the children...emotionally, socially, physically the point is not who pays for what..the point in this case is are the children taken care of? do they have everything they need? the courts would evaluate that as well..they may not issue more child support because that is based on his income not hers..what they would more likely do is issue temporary physical custody of the children to him..until the mother could again provide what the children need |
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Edited by
AllSmilesInTulsa
on
Sun 01/04/09 07:22 AM
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If you are NOT supposed to pay for daycare, take your divorce papers to the daycare center and show them you are NOT responsible for the bill.
Whether your ex is working or not is not your concern. In this economy, many are losing their jobs but that doesn't make you automatically responsible for the daycare bill. |
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If you are paying child support and daycare payments are part of it, yes you have the right to know. You also have the right to know if your ex isn't working as well since she may go back to the courts and ask for more child support now. I am paying the max for child support so I am not worried about that. But It may affect my decision to take her to court and get primary placement of my girls. |
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If my ex lost her job and isnt working? I recently got a letter from the daycare my girls were attending and there was an outstanding balance. I've gone back and forth with them and my ex that I am not supposed to be paying that bill. In the last on with the outstanding balance the director of the daycare wrote a note stating that she knows the girls havent been attending but the balance is still due. The last date on the letter was 10/20/08 now I'm taking that as my girls havent been there since then and my ex hasnt mentioned it to me. I never thought about it when I would pick them up that she always had them at home and I wasnt getting them from daycare. So hence my question do I have the right to know? I feel it involves the welfare of my girls and I should know. I think you have a right to know, especially if she might not be able to proved for the girls. JMO |
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If i received a bill that someone else was supposed to be paying and it was now falling on me to fork out the money, i would certainly discuss, not confront to get answers. Good luck
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If you are NOT supposed to pay for daycare, take your divorce papers to the daycare center and show them you are NOT responsible for the bill. Whether your ex is working or not is not your concern. In this economy, many are losing their jobs but that doesn't make you automatically responsible for the daycare bill. 
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If you are paying child support and daycare payments are part of it, yes you have the right to know. You also have the right to know if your ex isn't working as well since she may go back to the courts and ask for more child support now. I am paying the max for child support so I am not worried about that. But It may affect my decision to take her to court and get primary placement of my girls. Tim I agree with the other ladies, if your ex not working is affecting her abilities to take care and provide for your children then you definiely have the right to know and the right to do something about it. I would first talk to you ex and see what is exactly going on first |
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This sure makes me appreciate the amicable relationship I have w/my ex husband. We keep in touch about everything. And even tho he's remarried when I got laid off 5 weeks ago he offered for the kids AND me to come live with them if needed. (We wouldn't but it's the thought that counts)
THAT'S communication. 
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If you are paying child support and daycare payments are part of it, yes you have the right to know. You also have the right to know if your ex isn't working as well since she may go back to the courts and ask for more child support now. I am paying the max for child support so I am not worried about that. But It may affect my decision to take her to court and get primary placement of my girls. Tim I agree with the other ladies, if your ex not working is affecting her abilities to take care and provide for your children then you definiely have the right to know and the right to do something about it. I would first talk to you ex and see what is exactly going on first I plan on doing that I just realized this on Thursday so I havent brought it up to her yet. But I will Thanks |
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This sure makes me appreciate the amicable relationship I have w/my ex husband. We keep in touch about everything. And even tho he's remarried when I got laid off 5 weeks ago he offered for the kids AND me to come live with them if needed. (We wouldn't but it's the thought that counts) THAT'S communication. It's funny you said that's communication cause my ex is always stateing that I dont communicate with her. And I have to admit a lot of times I have nothing to say to her unless it involves my girls. It seems kind of ironic that she would let me know something like this. |
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This sure makes me appreciate the amicable relationship I have w/my ex husband. We keep in touch about everything. And even tho he's remarried when I got laid off 5 weeks ago he offered for the kids AND me to come live with them if needed. (We wouldn't but it's the thought that counts) THAT'S communication. It's funny you said that's communication cause my ex is always stateing that I dont communicate with her. And I have to admit a lot of times I have nothing to say to her unless it involves my girls. It seems kind of ironic that she would let me know something like this. She may not have told you solely because she is worried about loosing primary custody of the children either way you have a right to know if it does in fact affect the welfare of the children |
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I think the situation warrants some Q&A with the Ex.
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I think the situation warrants some Q&A with the Ex. I plan on bringing it up to her. I just wish she would have told me. But then again if I had any trust left for her I would probably still be married. |
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