Topic: lives with mom...
hgraham88's photo
Sun 12/28/08 09:58 AM

I moved out of my moms as soon as I graduated high school in 93. Been on my own since. I had a steady job for ten years and purchased a brand new custom built house. I lived in the house for about three years, and hard times took their toll. I ended up selling the house and moving in with my moms, to get back on my feet.

Does this make me a loser?


Were u smoking pot in her basement working part time at a book store?

alonenotlonely's photo
Sun 12/28/08 09:59 AM

I moved back in the the basement apartment of my parents because of my fathers health was fastly on the decline. If some chick has a problem with it she can keep stepping!!!!!people that matter dont mind, people that mind dont matter!!!!


Why does it seem to less "stereotypical" when it's a father. This seems easier for me to understand for some reason.

no photo
Sun 12/28/08 09:59 AM

okay so i'm just curious as to how others see this. i mean there are so many circumstances to the situation that may have to warant goin home to momma especially in these very hard times...

so what do you think when you find out someone lives with their mom?

for instance... i may have to move back to help her. i'm not about to leave her hanging from the economy downfall... plus its a deal. i can go back to school. but... who knows. its up in the air.

but! there was once this guy who took me out and he admitted he lived with his mom. he was 31, smoked alot of pot and pretty much did nothin but work part time at barnes & noble books.

sooo.. whats the general consensus?



FROM WHERE I COME IS KINDA KIDS ''OBLIGATION'' TO LIVE WITH PARENTS .AND IN FACT WHY ALL THAT WORK TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR KIDS FOR 18 YEARS AND THEN LIVE US ALONE WHEN WE MOST NEED THEM? WE DON'T BELIEVE IN NURSING HOMES .OR THEY ARE THERE FOR PEOPLE IN A VERY SPECIAL SITUATIONS



no photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:00 AM

I moved out of my moms as soon as I graduated high school in 93. Been on my own since. I had a steady job for ten years and purchased a brand new custom built house. I lived in the house for about three years, and hard times took their toll. I ended up selling the house and moving in with my moms, to get back on my feet.

Does this make me a loser?


Not if you pull your weight there.

Filmfreek's photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:01 AM


I moved out of my moms as soon as I graduated high school in 93. Been on my own since. I had a steady job for ten years and purchased a brand new custom built house. I lived in the house for about three years, and hard times took their toll. I ended up selling the house and moving in with my moms, to get back on my feet.

Does this make me a loser?


Were u smoking pot in her basement working part time at a book store?


Haha. She doesnt have a basement.

laugh

AndyBgood's photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:01 AM
The description you gave me is that of a total LOOSER GO NO WHERE NOBODY!

Lives with mom. Smokes a lot of pot. Works at Barnes and Noble part time. Be very glad you didn't get stuck with him.

I am 4:20 compliant, but I live on my own. I never lived with my mom after my parents divorced. And between the job I have I also have two other jobs and all are part time in their own way but cumulatively I work full time and I get treated like I am something just a drone a lot by women as a dating prospect. It is the nature of the game.

Mexican family life is different in that the Patron and Patrona usually live with the kids and the kids will live at home until married but the ethics of their life style are different and respectable.

In our society to be thirty + and living at home for any reason other than to keep an eye on elderly parents is far less than honorable. I can understand the economy sucks BUT living at home?
DAMN!

Now that does not mean that people that hit bottom so hard that they need to regroup themselves at their parents is another thing. I can respect people that do try to better themselves in the face of adversity even if they have to fall back on family. You are right that each situation is different but it sounds like the guy you described is a classic Basement troll. No life, no ambition, no good, and WORTHLESS.

Now as far as you moving in with your mother, she is family and if she needs the help and you truly love her your act is honorable. Don't let ANYBODY look down on you for taking care of family. Family is all we got sometimes when the world SH**S on you.

Also do not let the current situation end your education. Depending on the job a degree of any kind means more money. Depending on the career path you are on a degree can mean the difference between getting that really high paying job or not. You may have to attend a different school in light of the situation you are facing BUT change is the ONLY constant in life.

Adapt,evolve,and overcome!


...That is my take on this...

Rockmybobbysocks's photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:02 AM

I moved out of my moms as soon as I graduated high school in 93. Been on my own since. I had a steady job for ten years and purchased a brand new custom built house. I lived in the house for about three years, and hard times took their toll. I ended up selling the house and moving in with my moms, to get back on my feet.

Does this make me a loser?


see i don't think so. i used to think so because that was just who i was. but i think that you did what you had to do to survive and making tough choices makes you more of a man.. not less. ya know?

now if you just chose to stay there and mooch off mommy instead of gettin back out there when you could. then i'd wonder.

but tough times call for tough choices. ya know? and we all learn that the hard way.. one way or another.

krupa's photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:03 AM
In the eventuallity of time...I foresee my Dad moving in with me. My Mom will move in with my sis. Life does tend to happen.

But, if you are simply talking about someone not willing to take personal responsibility and just mooching a free ride while suckling off the teat as a grown-@ssed adult...I do not respect that.

no photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:04 AM
so .....why is it ....wrong....if having lived on their own for more than 30 yrs, raising their own family.....then returning to the Family home to help the very people who raised you.
I moved from the east coast to here solely for to purpose of helping my brother care for our ailing parents. They both need daily care and they need help dealing with finances in this troubled economy.
These are the people who cared for me when I ailed, put me tru my education so that I could be an independent person.
After all they have done for me, I find it not the least bit awkward that in their last years,I would come "home" to give something back to them.
my aren't we all so quick to ....Judge....

hgraham88's photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:05 AM



I moved out of my moms as soon as I graduated high school in 93. Been on my own since. I had a steady job for ten years and purchased a brand new custom built house. I lived in the house for about three years, and hard times took their toll. I ended up selling the house and moving in with my moms, to get back on my feet.

Does this make me a loser?


Were u smoking pot in her basement working part time at a book store?


Haha. She doesnt have a basement.

laugh


See lol then that doesn't make u a loser your a loser if u mooch off of her.

Queene123's photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:06 AM
there was this guy that i met when my daughter was little, and he lived with his mom... turned out he was a big time mamma boy....

he even moved out of his moms as we moved intogether (bad mistake) we had been arguing a week, and i came from from babysitting my nephew and we got into it again.. and he went and got his mommy, and she said something and i went off on her, but any how i ended up calling my sister, and he came in with a knife, and his mom just stood there. i was freaking out on the phone telling my sister what he had done, and of course my family was there within matter of mins with the police.. i was out of there and out of his life...

i ran into him a few yrs ago and im pretty he has some form of mental problem now just by what i saw in his actions..

his mom died awhile back..... when my daughter was little any child wouldnt have a scare issue but his mom was a complete nag,and my daughter wouldnt even go up to her, she scared of her.. she loved his stepdad for he was a very peaceful person. and that old bf used his parents

Rockmybobbysocks's photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:08 AM

The description you gave me is that of a total LOOSER GO NO WHERE NOBODY!

Lives with mom. Smokes a lot of pot. Works at Barnes and Noble part time. Be very glad you didn't get stuck with him.

I am 4:20 compliant, but I live on my own. I never lived with my mom after my parents divorced. And between the job I have I also have two other jobs and all are part time in their own way but cumulatively I work full time and I get treated like I am something just a drone a lot by women as a dating prospect. It is the nature of the game.

Mexican family life is different in that the Patron and Patrona usually live with the kids and the kids will live at home until married but the ethics of their life style are different and respectable.

In our society to be thirty + and living at home for any reason other than to keep an eye on elderly parents is far less than honorable. I can understand the economy sucks BUT living at home?
DAMN!

Now that does not mean that people that hit bottom so hard that they need to regroup themselves at their parents is another thing. I can respect people that do try to better themselves in the face of adversity even if they have to fall back on family. You are right that each situation is different but it sounds like the guy you described is a classic Basement troll. No life, no ambition, no good, and WORTHLESS.

Now as far as you moving in with your mother, she is family and if she needs the help and you truly love her your act is honorable. Don't let ANYBODY look down on you for taking care of family. Family is all we got sometimes when the world SH**S on you.

Also do not let the current situation end your education. Depending on the job a degree of any kind means more money. Depending on the career path you are on a degree can mean the difference between getting that really high paying job or not. You may have to attend a different school in light of the situation you are facing BUT change is the ONLY constant in life.

Adapt,evolve,and overcome!


...That is my take on this...


i was born and raised in a traditional mexican family and yes the eldest is responsible for taking care of the parents which my mom does as she's the eldest. but even in any hispanic culture to live with mom/dad for so long that you're roots are as thick as the family tree.. then its just overboard. i mean independance can make a difference. but then thats just my opinion. regardless of culture.

yeah i get what you are saying. but if someone has to do what they have to do to survive.. then by god do it. it beats homelessness... it beats the other crap that can come along. ya know?

and yeah... basement troll. i'm stealin that. lol yeah he was just creepy. funny.. i met him on POF>

no photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:10 AM


Hmmmmm I guess it does depend on the circumstances, but I gotta admit, when I here a guy is living at home with his parents Its a definite turn off.


see thats exactly the was i used to think too. i mean i wanted someone independant and strong. not someone who's livin in mom's basement.

but then drama went down and my own mom was like "mija.. i'm working so much overtime just to pay the mortgage" and it scared the crap outta me.

now... i dont know what to think.


who cares what anyone thinks...for you and the dude with his mom and diabetes...if ppl aren't willing to get to know and find out why....do you really want them in your life???

the answer is No

Rockmybobbysocks's photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:10 AM

so .....why is it ....wrong....if having lived on their own for more than 30 yrs, raising their own family.....then returning to the Family home to help the very people who raised you.
I moved from the east coast to here solely for to purpose of helping my brother care for our ailing parents. They both need daily care and they need help dealing with finances in this troubled economy.
These are the people who cared for me when I ailed, put me tru my education so that I could be an independent person.
After all they have done for me, I find it not the least bit awkward that in their last years,I would come "home" to give something back to them.
my aren't we all so quick to ....Judge....



not really. not all.

i mean judgement isn't my job. what you describe is a common factor and should be held in the highest respect because nothing is a bigger turn off than men who treat their parents badly.

except mommas boys. but thats a whole other thread.

hgraham88's photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:14 AM




i was born and raised in a traditional mexican family and yes the eldest is responsible for taking care of the parents which my mom does as she's the eldest. but even in any hispanic culture to live with mom/dad for so long that you're roots are as thick as the family tree.. then its just overboard. i mean independance can make a difference. but then thats just my opinion. regardless of culture.

yeah i get what you are saying. but if someone has to do what they have to do to survive.. then by god do it. it beats homelessness... it beats the other crap that can come along. ya know?

and yeah... basement troll. i'm stealin that. lol yeah he was just creepy. funny.. i met him on POF>


Oh I'm On POF and have a date with someone from there tonight great now I'm going to have to ask the hard questions lol

Rockmybobbysocks's photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:16 AM





i was born and raised in a traditional mexican family and yes the eldest is responsible for taking care of the parents which my mom does as she's the eldest. but even in any hispanic culture to live with mom/dad for so long that you're roots are as thick as the family tree.. then its just overboard. i mean independance can make a difference. but then thats just my opinion. regardless of culture.

yeah i get what you are saying. but if someone has to do what they have to do to survive.. then by god do it. it beats homelessness... it beats the other crap that can come along. ya know?

and yeah... basement troll. i'm stealin that. lol yeah he was just creepy. funny.. i met him on POF>


Oh I'm On POF and have a date with someone from there tonight great now I'm going to have to ask the hard questions lol


LOL yeah seriously. POF is a trip. i can tell you dating horror stories that would make your hair curl. lol

no photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:16 AM


so .....why is it ....wrong....if having lived on their own for more than 30 yrs, raising their own family.....then returning to the Family home to help the very people who raised you.
I moved from the east coast to here solely for to purpose of helping my brother care for our ailing parents. They both need daily care and they need help dealing with finances in this troubled economy.
These are the people who cared for me when I ailed, put me tru my education so that I could be an independent person.
After all they have done for me, I find it not the least bit awkward that in their last years,I would come "home" to give something back to them.
my aren't we all so quick to ....Judge....



not really. not all.

i mean judgement isn't my job. what you describe is a common factor and should be held in the highest respect because nothing is a bigger turn off than men who treat their parents badly.

except mommas boys. but thats a whole other thread.


I understand and respect your original point, but I do run into this alot.
I work 60 + hrs a week, care for and see to the finances of my parents on a daily basis.
I do it because they deserve it. We as a family do not put our old folks away. never have, never will. It is just something I believe in and do, and if someone does not understand that, it is their loss not mine.

bigsmile

hgraham88's photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:20 AM






i was born and raised in a traditional mexican family and yes the eldest is responsible for taking care of the parents which my mom does as she's the eldest. but even in any hispanic culture to live with mom/dad for so long that you're roots are as thick as the family tree.. then its just overboard. i mean independance can make a difference. but then thats just my opinion. regardless of culture.

yeah i get what you are saying. but if someone has to do what they have to do to survive.. then by god do it. it beats homelessness... it beats the other crap that can come along. ya know?

and yeah... basement troll. i'm stealin that. lol yeah he was just creepy. funny.. i met him on POF>


Oh I'm On POF and have a date with someone from there tonight great now I'm going to have to ask the hard questions lol


LOL yeah seriously. POF is a trip. i can tell you dating horror stories that would make your hair curl. lol


Seriously...Crap

Rockmybobbysocks's photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:24 AM







i was born and raised in a traditional mexican family and yes the eldest is responsible for taking care of the parents which my mom does as she's the eldest. but even in any hispanic culture to live with mom/dad for so long that you're roots are as thick as the family tree.. then its just overboard. i mean independance can make a difference. but then thats just my opinion. regardless of culture.

yeah i get what you are saying. but if someone has to do what they have to do to survive.. then by god do it. it beats homelessness... it beats the other crap that can come along. ya know?

and yeah... basement troll. i'm stealin that. lol yeah he was just creepy. funny.. i met him on POF>


Oh I'm On POF and have a date with someone from there tonight great now I'm going to have to ask the hard questions lol


LOL yeah seriously. POF is a trip. i can tell you dating horror stories that would make your hair curl. lol


Seriously...Crap


lol don't stress.

no photo
Sun 12/28/08 10:24 AM
I moved in with my mother at her insistent pleas. She was a widow and getting up in years, scared being alone if she got hurt or needed medical attention. And, she died after a couple of years.
I've been meeting a lot of men MY AGE who either have moved back in with the folks or have rented a room with 2 or more other renters. I guess I would do the same if it meant saving money and I had no kids to accommodate.

But, if they are just doing it because they can work part time and smoke weed, what does that tell you? Freeloader. Don't need any more of that crap in my life.