Would you be able to look in the mirror and forgive yourself, still love
yourself, if you found you lost your way, but made yourself believe
that you knew the way for so many years, just in order to carry on (like
a wake up call)?

i can forgive others but

forgive myself for my mistakes is harder

i know i made mistakes n it marked me for the rest of my life


party on...

No I struggle every day with my religious beliefs and my thinking and
actions at times.

However I keep trying! To err is human.

all u can do is the best u can..and its hard to forgive yourself..i
still struggle with it with past mistakes i've made.but, i also look at
it is we are human and we r going to make mistakes and u cant beat
yourself up over it..life goes on..u have to learn from
them..

ya ladies be honest


would yall or could yall
date or have a relationship with someone
knowing they cheated on someone in the past


i did that 20 years ago n still payin the price
no woman will date me


party on...

We should try to remember that God forgives us and we all belong to Him
so we must therefore forgive ourselves. It is sometimes the most
difficult thing for us to do. A dear friend of mine passed on today to
be with our Lord...I hope that you would all keep her family and friends
in your prayers...God Bless you...Kaffey

yes i will put them in my prayers happy



i know GOD the father forgives me but very few does

i look at it as past is the past
i cant change it

but the future is in his hands

party on....

Bright...I am so very sorry to hear a friend has passed away today. My
heart and thoughts are with you.

Bright, two and sweet.....I understand what you each have said. We are
our own worst critic's are we not? I know I am and fierecly hard on
myself so I have never needed anyone to point out or remind me of
mistakes or fault's. Two....I don't know where to start, honestly,
because I have been guilty of running from men that have done just that
in their past. I know that is not right and that people can change and
learn from their mistakes, my fear is, is that he would just do it again
and that is a very hard reality to risk opening your heart to. It's not
you, it's the deception, the act of betrayal that I would have
difficulty getting past. The only possible way to ever do that, would to
be completly know, understand, trust and accept him before a commitment
was made.

I have learned it is ok to make mistake's, we are only human, not
machines, lol. Someone dear pointed out that what is not ok, is to keep
repeating the same mistake's expecting different result's. And that
what is not ok, is to tightly pack away things from the past, deep
inside you, forgetting them and moving forward. I guess that is what
lead me to ask the question of the thread, and because it is something
that is heavy in my heart right now.

so sorry bright for your loss

I've looked in that "mirror" that you are speaking of and I know that I
came out a better person. Our struggles are hard but "the Lord doesn't
give us more than we can handle". Our life choices are what make each
and every one of us unique. IMHO ±

jane

i understand

thats why i can never find true love
cuz of my past
but we all can be friends n learn from each other n encourage each other

i know i can learn somethin new everyday

party on...

Thyme...you know exactly what I am speaking of and where I am right now.
Thank you.

Two...I refuse to believe you lead yourself to believe and accept that.
If that were true far too many of us would be wondering around lost and
so very alone, forever. That can't be meant to be. Do we build a wall
around ourselve's to not just protect ourselves, but to further punish
ourselves for mistake's and keep other's out because we can't forgive
ourselves?

jane

i can understand what ya sayin

but women find it hard to trust one that cheated before
n i can understand
but i been payin for it for 20 years

n yes i am lonely
but who would honestly trust me

for one mistake

but we all live n learn

party on...

I consider myself a very good person.. but i feel very lost and have a
hard time forgiving myslef for past mistakes

WoW!!! It has taken me a long time to learn how to forgive
myself,,, I have also learned that my past mistakes is
what has made me become who I am today,,, Forgiving
oneself has aloud me to heal and to move forward in life
it has also allowed me to fogive others, Turning the cheek
so to say,,, Fogive others and ((me))) for they no not what
they ((me))) do sometimes,, Remember Tomorrow is not
promised to us,, Forgive each other and oneself, be happy
and Make some one smile,,,

Jane, Two, and all the rest of us....

"Yes, what joy for those whose record the LORD has cleared of sin, whose
lives are lived in complete honesty! When I refused to confess my sin, I
was weak and miserable, and I groaned all day long. Day and night your
hand of discipline was heavy on me. My strength evaporated like water in
the summer heat. Finally, I confessed all my sins to you and stopped
trying to hide them. I said to myself, 'I will confess my rebellion to
the LORD.' And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone." Psalms

"How can I get rid of this terrible guilt?" a distraught father recently
asked. I have been in a terrible conflict with one of my sons for many
years. Two weeks ago I was so frustrated with him that I said to myself,
'I wish he would die.' That night he died."

This father is blaming himself for the death of his son. In his mind he
is convinced that Satan killed him because of his wish.

We can understand why this father is distraught. However, the fact is,
he didn't cause his son to die. His son had been very ill for some time
and died of natural causes. If Satan had anything to do with this
matter, it was sowing the lie in the father's mind about the devil
killing his son. What the father is struggling with is not guilt but
false guilt.

One of the difficulties regarding guilt is learning to tell the
difference between real guilt and false guilt. Because they pretty much
feel the same, it can be challenging to sort out the real from the
false.

Some counselors claim that all guilt is psychologically damaging, but
this is nonsense. If we don't feel guilty when we do wrong, we'd be a
bunch of psychopaths with dead consciences. It's false guilt that is
psychologically damaging because it keeps people in endless bondage not
because of what they did, but because of their faulty thinking.

To resolve real guilt, for our spiritual wellbeing we need to admit what
we have done wrong, confess it to God and ask for his forgiveness. When
we do this God forgives us. He promised he would. For our mental
wellbeing we also need to confess our wrongdoing to at least one trusted
friend or counselor, and wherever possible ask the one we wronged for
their forgiveness and seek to make amends for what we have done. And
then, regardless of whether this person forgives us or not, God has
forgiven us and we need to forgive ourselves. When we genuinely do this,
we experience the relief that David experienced when he confessed his
sin with Bathsheba.

However, if having done all of this and we still feel guilty, the
feeling is false guilt and that is a totally different matter. We need
to seek help from a pastor, priest or counselor.

Thank you for those words OleJeb. Is nice to have someone put them right
where they can be seen versus wandering in circles trying to find the
starting point.

ole jeb

ty for those wonderful words

i been talkinb to the elder of my church about this for many years

n still i cant get rid of the guilt
i did wrong n i know it

i been to her n asked forgiveness n she has forgiven me
n she has moved on with her life

im proud of the man she has n wished them both luck

but the guilt is still there

nothin i can do can ever take it away


party on...

Thanks for the words jeb..

im just still trying to find my way back and its hard when hope seams to
be a thing that is in short supply

twostep

We both cheated on eachother, got help, forgave & put it bk together.

We are all a product of our education & when/where we are educated. If
we are constantly improving our knowledge, we can change. If we don't
we are stuck whever we are.

I learned to forgive myself for my past & have been working on paying
back ever since.

Try to help others learn as I did.