Ahhhh, another wholesome (albeit English-challenged) American girl has
appeared in my inbox (not on JSH), to wit:

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I dislike...: i dislike who is honesty
i dislike who is not trusthfull
i dislike who is not good on bed

Description: i am lopes from wisconsin and i was born on the february 14
1980 ,i am a us citizen and i am here to meet a soul mate ,i am
searching for one that will love
me , I will relocate to the prerson if he is trully want me

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"i dislike who is honesty" -- ??

"good on bed" -- ??

"born on the february 14 1980" -- interesting use of the definite
article there....

It's a tough call, but I think I'm gonna have to pass on this one....

But what fun you could have in teaching her proper syntax!

Well, the problem is she dislike who is honesty. So now I'd have to
teach her dishonest syntax and I would have to say she's already pretty
good at that part!

Hey! I'm in Wisconsin. Lopes must have snuck in from Canada.
It's difficult to build a wall in the middle of a lake.
There are llamas in Manitoba who know how, but they are demanding way to
many socks to do the job.

She sounds vaguely Canadian, eh?

Yubetcha.

lol Lex! I see how that is quite the paradox!

Hey now how many freaks do you think we have over here? Just because I
am here does not mean anything!

It's what we writers cal a "conundrum" once we discover that is not a
percussion instrument.

We weren't talking about the Ontarionians, Whisper, we were talking
about the Manitobobians.

Oh sure change the story now

Apparently you're unaware of the secret Spanish outpost Santa Anna
established in the Yukon just before the battle of San Jacinto...

I think so Nus, must have slept threw that lesson.

That's OK whisper. In Wisconsin we think of Canadians as just really
cold yoopers. (except for you, of course.)

Did you know Baffin Island is actually owned by Portugal?

I do now. But Portugal never invaded the Lone Star Republic of Texas and
escaped to a stronghold in the Yukon. They like the rock too much.

He is my favorite wrestler. Well, next to Rikishi and Kamala.

You should introduce him to lopes.

You know, LOPES is POLES spelled sideways.

There are a lot of poles in Canada. I hear they carve strange images of
god-like wrestlers on them and dance around them in the moonlight.