Topic: Medium
myanimalcracker's photo
Mon 10/27/08 10:46 PM
Too bold, too bold

those strokes irritate

and the medium rebels

against the brush and color

-especially the color!

The surface is deep sanguine

and sky metallic blue

a moving, energy memory,

looking for a nouny place

to exist.



If he holds the brush lightly

He can glide it over,

ignoring the lines

(Watch the lines)

and ignore the darkness

and light errors, the friction of

delight and lose the way.



He could write coldness and light

carrying those sentences away

in little wagons of form,

He could stir the clouds and air

into rapid signs.

But, his

Paint brush is down,

He's looking

covering his eyes at the mistakes

another failure of light.

Mostly, he wants to write on someone

painting one figure at a time

drowning himself in texture

and that pure, piaster of paint

He managed to place without

pigment.

MirrorMirror's photo
Mon 10/27/08 11:18 PM
flowerforyou niceflowerforyou

s1owhand's photo
Tue 10/28/08 07:11 AM
inspired :heart: flowerforyou once upon a time

LAMom's photo
Tue 10/28/08 11:12 AM
:heart: flowers :heart:

no photo
Tue 10/28/08 11:25 AM
love it!!flowerforyou :heart:

Pathnine's photo
Wed 10/29/08 12:45 PM
Hey, I'd like to give you some feedback about your poem...

The line, "looking for a nouny place to exist". - I don't think this works - it sounds too light-hearted for the context. I think that if you're going to make up a word, then you should try to keep it within the flavor of the line.

The line, "If he holds the brush lightly He can glide it over,ignoring the lines (Watch the lines)... -very good use of parenthesis! I like it!

The line, "...and that pure, piaster of paint..." - is that a typo? Did you mean to write "plaster of paint?"

This is a beautiful poem. I'm looking forward to reading more of your work!

jimz's photo
Wed 10/29/08 06:40 PM
you are an awesome writer!