keys to liquor cabinet are still around my neck

I came up with some more ideas for my babysitting guide on the drive home

the wheels are always turning in that head of yours ain't they

Hi {{sharon}} how are you doll

Not Good Merle, but can't discuss here.

Ok thanks anyways

You have email Sharon

OMG, I have some more additions to my guide

Okay folks, UPDATE












I am babysitting again for a friend of mine next month, so I am sending out an S.O.S. for brightly colored duct tape, bubble wrap and clear tape. And oh yeah, black sharpies. So please, dig into your pockets and help a girl out here

FOLKS, I NEED SOME MORE ADVICE AND POINTERS, I AM DOING IT AGAIN NEXT MONTH FOR A FRIEND AND SHE HAS THREE KIDS, SO PLEASE SOME POINTERS FOR MY NEXT DUTY STATION


Here are my well earned rights as a bonafide babysitter, rules for proper babysitting, not necessarily to be used in the order written or all at once (or yes can be), whichever you choose:

1. Lots and lots of 2-liter bottles of coke (must be the real thing, not decaf or diet)

a. To perform loud belches
b. To release lots and lots of butt gas

(disclaimer: not responsible for smell, have lots of air freshener handy)

2. Keys (well hidden throughout the house) to the liquor cabinet and have an extra set around your neck

3. Changes of underwear and slippers for those accidental pissing bouts you may encounter

4. Bottles and bottles of Benadryl (for allergic reactions and sleep deprived nights) **looking around neck for keys to liquor cabinet**

5. Keys (well hidden throughout the house) to the liquor cabinet

6. Fast moving ceiling fans (must be able to hold at least 130 pounds while spinning in mid-air) **looking around neck for keys to liquor cabinet**

7. Plenty of paper towels to clean up mess from #1 above **looking around neck for keys to liquor cabinet**

8. Keys (well hidden throughout the house) to the liquor cabinet

9. Rolls and rolls of duct tape (assorted colors, I found that the kids are attracted to bright colors, thanks Patti ) **looking around neck for keys to liquor cabinet**

Suggestion from Tazz (thanks Tazz), clear tape so visitors can't see the tape on their mouths

10. Reams and reams of bubble wrap (thanks Connie) so when they roll across the floor, they pop loud (hey, you need to enjoy it as well) and don't break furniture and fine glassware as they hit it **looking around neck for keys to liquor cabinet**

Suggestion from peekinin (thanks Ell), a black marker so you will know which "END" is "UP"

11. Plenty of paint to hide the marks from the duct tape **looking around neck for keys to liquor cabinet**

12. Keys (well hidden throughout the house) to the liquor cabinet

13. When you decide to babysit, make sure it is in a state where school is open 365 days a year (minus 1 day for religious observance) **looking around neck for keys to liquor cabinet**

14. Keys (well hidden throughout the house) to the liquor cabinet

15. Teach the kids these simple phrases:

a. Yes ma'am (or sir)
b. Yes ma'am (or sir)
c. Yes ma'am (or sir)

16. Plenty of band-aids/antiseptic cream in case the kids scrape their knuckles/knees/hands/faces trying to break free from the duct tape restraints **looking around neck for keys to liquor cabinet**

17. You must be able to run faster than the children you are babysitting **looking around neck for keys to liquor cabinet**

18. Make sure you know how to cook, kids like to eat **looking around neck for keys to liquor cabinet**

19. Keys (well hidden throughout the house) to the liquor cabinet

20. Keys (well hidden throughout the house) to the liquor cabinet

21. A sound proof room to keep kids in, so when you pass out (after, you find the keys to the liquor cabinet) no one can hear them yelling for a bathroom break! (Kudos again Tazz)**looking around neck for keys to liquor cabinet**

22. Keys (well hidden throughout the house) to the liquor cabinet



*****PLEASE REMEMBER THESE RULES WILL NOT WORK WITH ALL KIDS, JUST SOME

If there are three of them...handcuffs are in order here! Cuff them all together so they can't gang up on ya!

AND THE KEYS TO THE LIQUOR CABINET ARE AROUND YOUR NECK!!!!!!

Awesome {{tazz}} I will add it to the guide

Merle while ya finding key to liquor cabinet don't for get hide cuff keys an if duct tape don't work extra strong rope works if that don't work make them watch barney tapes over an over again

Do you have a garage?
If ya do...you will need 2 ropes and a couple of bike hooks..... Set up the rope so two hang down...attach the hooks at the end...
Now, when the children get there you MUST show this to them in order to strike fear in thier little hearts and tell them that is is for the bad ones.....

A little blood doens't hurt to add on the floor below the ropes......

Straitjackets also work well when there are 3 kids to watch

((J)) this would work but kids hate to get dressed......how would you make it into a game?