Ok So I rescently figured out that I have feelings for my best friend of 13 years. What makes this complicated is we do have quite a history together. Friends for a long time at first then dated a little and stopped. Then about 4 years ago we kind of dated a while and were sleeping together for a while. We stopped doing that and remained friends. Well we wathched that movie Maid of Honor and well it made me realize that Im that guy.. im head over heels in love with her but I dont think or know if she feels the same way.. I mean I know she is scared of losing the friendship but its getting to the point now where I dont wanna see her with anyone but me cause it hurts ya know? Anyways I just need some advice from some girls on here and especially if you have ever been in a similar situation.


Thanks,
Bob

The fact that you have remained friends through the previous intimate situations tells me that you can trust her with your feelings. Tell her. If she does not feel the same way you have a decision to make. You may need to distance yourself until your feelings are under control and you can once again handle the friendship.

I want too trust me just very tough.. See everyone around us thinks we are dating anyways. We go to al family funtcions couple showers weddings, go to dinner all the time buy things for eachother all the time actually thinking about getting our cell phones on a family plan i have keys to her place and stay there whenever just a bunch of mixed signals. But then when she starts dating i kind of get pushed aside.

So? That is just definition of your friendship. Do you really want a solution to the problem or do you just want to whine?

My intent is not to be mean. It is to get you to realize your situation. Excuses are abundant. You stopped sleeping together for a reason. Do you feel it is because she is not interested in you in that way? If so, keep your distance. If it is too difficult to see her dating another, give it a lot of distance.

Im looking for a solution! Im not whining at all just explaining the whole situation *****

OK, let me ask you this..
Why would you NOT tell her your feelings?

Apparently this is causing you a great deal of frustration, not to mention some hurt in that you don't like to see her with anyone else.

IMO, you should tell her. Or if you'd feel more comfortable, ask HER to define y'all's relationship, how SHE sees it. Depending on her answer, you may have the answer to your own questions that you seem to be afraid to ask.

Either way, staying in this "limbo" can't be a lot of fun, maybe she has the same feelings you do, but she won't talk about it either because she has the same fears.

Communication is the best solution to whatever issues anyone has. JMO....and good luck.

dont wanna take a chance of making things weird or losing a friend...


Onemoretimearound....


thanks i think thats the best advice i have heard

hi, you have not lost her through everything else, why not tell her how you really feel. And then give her some space to think about the possibilities of really seriously moving past "just friends'. Most people are looking for a relationhip with a good friend. I say go for it!