Alcohol Warnings
A little humor off the net ...

Due to increasing products liability, alcoholic beverages manufacturers have accepted the Medical Association's suggestion that the following Warning labels be placed immediately on all bottles.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a wanker.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to smash your face in.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that people are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your clothes.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you possess mystical Kung-Fu powers.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may lead to traffic signs and cones appearing in your home.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that people are laughing with you.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.

Warning: Consumption of alcohol may actually cause pregnancy.

That was really good.

Only the sized bottle of alcohol I was drinking had room for all that.

this happened to me last weekend! i was at the bar with 5 people from work, and i went outside for what i thought was only a minute, and when i went back inside, everyone was gone!
the next day i talked to one of them and they said that i knew they left, and even shook his hand when he went.

have NO recollection of that AT ALL