thanks love =)

I hate the waiting game at work. Boooooring.. lol

1. Why wouldn't you have all of our supplies ready when we get to work?? Now we have to wait! Annoying much!

2. Why do you insist on focusing on things you have no control over? Why do you worry about things that 99.9% of the time never come to pass? Just do what can. Leave the rest to chance. Most of the time everything works out just as it should. It may not be exactly what you want, but there are reasons for almost everything.

3. I want to know why you cannot see past yourself. How does it feel to be so self-absorbed? Because I wouldn't know. I want to understand why it's always about what's in it for you. You have been this way for as long as I can remember. I have been wanting to bridge this gap all of my life. Everytime I try, you push me away. I think it's because you're in denial. You do not want to take accountability for any of your actions. I guess it will always remain a mystery to me.. Perhaps it's time to give up trying to figure out what it is that makes you tick. I'm not so sure you even know..

4. When I helped take care of you as babies, I was just a baby myself. I really didn't have much of an early childhood because I had to help with the burping, feeding, changing, bathing, and clothing you both. I had to learn how to wash your bottles and clothes. I was only 4 years old. BUT I am not complaining. I love you both very much and would never say I regretted any of it. You will always be a part of me, and I will always be a part of you both.

5. If I had the chance to back in time and change anything in my life I wouldn't. I am who I am today because of the choices I have made and all of my experiences. I like and love who I am. I like my place in life. If I changed anything in my past it would change everything. I may not have met the people I like and love. I may not have the knowledge or love in my heart that I possess. You ask God for strength and he will allow you to feel life's pain to learn how to be strong. You ask God for wisdom and he will give you obstacles to gain the knowledge. Knowledge will come, but wisdom lingers. You must learn how to deal with the negative things in life so you can enjoy the pleasures life has to offer. Focusing on the unsatisfactory things in life will not allow you to enjoy living. We have to have a balance of good and bad things in life. We never learn from the positive things in life. We learn from our mistakes and difficult times. How would you appreciate the wonderful things in life if you have never experienced the worst? Just have some patience. Your decisions in life will inevitably lead you where you're supposed to be.

6. I am so proud of you! You're a wonderful mother and yet still so young yourself. You have two wonderful children that adore and mimic you. You are their hero. They trust you with their life. I say I'm proud, but that is an understatement. At first I worried how you would handle it. But now I couldn't ask for better because you have proved everyone wrong. Everytime someone tries to tell you how to raise your children, remember this. You're an amazing mother! Go with your intuition.

7. I just want you to know that I have tried everything I can think of to let you know where I stand. I miss you. I wish you would realize how much it hurts me to not be welcome in your home because of some betch that doesn't like me for reasons I cannot fathom. I do not even know why. I think she wants to control you. But you're in denial about it. You have always said I would be welcome. Now things have changed and I'm not sure how to deal with it. So now all I can do is move on. I'm sick of trying to understand. But one day I know you will look back with regret wishing you would of had the balls to stand up for what is right. I just hope that by then it isn't too late. But no matter what, I will always love you and wish you the best.

8. Do not let your illness bring you down. Life is too short. Live it to the fullest. You have a daughter that needs you. Laying in bed and feeling sorry for yourself isn't going to be good for you or anyone else. I know that you may not live to an old age or you may. But a positive attitude will get you far in life. I know you're in a lot of emotional and physical pain. This makes it difficult to fulfill your whole potential. But be a survivor! Stand strong and know that you're loved.

9. I am sooooo proud of you for defeating cancer! I know it wasn't easy. You astonished all of the doctors by proving them wrong. It truly is an incredible accomplishment considering your age. But you were persistent and refused to give up! I admire your determination and strength as well as your wisdom. You have taught me so much in my life! Thank you for being you. I love you.

10. I wish their was a chance for us. If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am? I know I have to let go of this notion because it will never happen. And trust me, I'm working on it. I will never disrepect you. So I will just keep it to myself until I get over it. I enjoy being friends. And I'm coming to terms with the fact that this is all it will ever be. But let me just say, if you knew the love in my heart, if you could feel what I feel, then you would see it in all of it's purity. But now I'm learning to love you as a friend. I couldn't ask for more. Thank you for being you. Thank you for being so understanding and patient with me. I am happy that you're part of my life. I no longer have any expectations. I will always be here for you. Do not hesitate to ask if you ever need anything. And yes, I mean anything! I don't care if it's 3am. I will always be here for you. If you ever needed me to, I would hop on the next flight to be there. You have a friend in me forever. I will never intentionally let you down. And if you ever change your mind, please tell me. Just know I would drop everything for this chance. Until then, I will just remain your friend unconditionally. No more and no less. Take care of you.