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| Topic: you know you're getting older when.. | |
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You know you're getting older when your mail box is full to bursting with adverts for viagra or aiagra................I'm a girl in case they hadn't noticed !!!!
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When your birthday cake becomes a FIRE HAZARD...
 
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When your birthday cake becomes a FIRE HAZARD... 
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A close friend of mine is turning 50 on Sunday and we are thowing a big bash for her.
Her cake is shaped like a hemmoriod donut. Her special birthday throne is a decorated wheelchair. Everyone is dressing in costumes to make us look much younger. And of course all the gag gifts we could find, you know like the slippers that fart when you walk, the can with the rear view mirror attached and the back up signal (beep beep beep) and others. Gonna be a riot!
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A close friend of mine is turning 50 on Sunday and we are thowing a big bash for her. Her cake is shaped like a hemmoriod donut. Her special birthday throne is a decorated wheelchair. Everyone is dressing in costumes to make us look much younger. And of course all the gag gifts we could find, you know like the slippers that fart when you walk, the can with the rear view mirror attached and the back up signal (beep beep beep) and others. Gonna be a riot! Sounds it, have a jolly good time a"Very Happy Birthday" to your friend.  
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Don't forget the marble! Tell her to plant and water on a regular basis. It takes thirty years to grow into a headstone!
Friends gave me one on my fortieth. |
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Don't forget the marble! Tell her to plant and water on a regular basis. It takes thirty years to grow into a headstone! Friends gave me one on my fortieth.
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You know you're getting old when...
You try to white out your spelling mistakes on the computer screen.. When you eat a banana for breakfest, throw your keys in the trash, and walk out with the banana peel. When coffee regular takes on a whole new meaning.. |
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Yeah the day I starting getting AARP emails was a bit sobering.
Along with someone thinking I was my Father's wife today  I'm feelin Real Good 
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Edited by
LookinRound
on
Fri 07/25/08 04:43 PM
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You're getting old when you go to the doctor and realize that you are now having to pay someone to look at you nekkid.
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If you look in the mirror and see a beer belly, your thinning hair, a big red nose, varicose veins, and a complexion like leather....just be thankful your eyesight hasn't failed.
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oh yall got a lot to look foward too
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You know your getting older.............
When you come home from work....and you need a nap!!! 
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You know you're getting old when you fart and dust blows out.
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You know you're getting old when you fart and dust blows out.
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You know you're getting old when you give someone the finger and your hand cramps up from arthritis
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sex after 60 is like shootin pool with a rope!!
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just in case anyone might need this....
Lovemaking Tips for Seniors 1. Wear your glasses. Make sure your partner is actually in the bed. 2. Set timer for 3 minutes, in case you doze off in the middle. 3. Set the mood with lighting. (Turn them ALL OFF!) 4. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin. 5. Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember. 6. Keep the polygrip close by so your teeth don't end up under the bed. 7. Have Tylenol ready in case you actually complete the act. 8. Make all the noise you want. The neighbors are deaf too. 9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news. 10. Don't even think about trying it twice. |
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You can drive a semi.......without a CDL
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