How would you feel about dating someone who has a mentally challenged son and In their mid 40's and they live with their mother?

The same as I would feel about dating anyone with a child.

love has no boundry

I agree with Chuck love should be unconditional .. and I think that if you are asking this question then prehaps you are looking for permission to end it and it be okay .. jmo follow your heart ...

My ex was a headcase, but she wasn't mentally challenged

If your dating someone who has a special child and it bothers you don't. The mother and child need your unconditional love. That's what it's all about.

I don't have a problem with a child that may require special care. I do have some concern about a person in their forties living with their mother. Don't know the circumstances surrounding the living arrangements, so I won't pass judgement. I dated a woman in her forties who lived with her parents. It made me uncomfortable.

I have a son I adopted with Down syndrome... sure there are days that are very challenging, but there are many rewards too. Raising a child with challenges is NOT for just everyone, and I would tell you to really think things through. If you are asking this question maybe you are wondering if you have what it takes to be a good parent to a child with special needs. I think you should take your feelings seriously and give yourself some time. I would not want my child to be around someone who isn't going to be able to handle living with my son because I know my son would certainly LOVE anyone and it would hurt him immensely to get close to someone and then have them pull away.

Life with Noah has had it's up and downs. I'm not sure what the particulars are with this child, but it often does take a lot of sacrafice (depending upon the circumstance). My son had two devices in his heart to close off two holes which have to be monitored, and I've had many therapists come into my home. This can be very stressful at times since I've always been a very private person.

When you love the mother, it's a package deal when it comes to the kids... special needs or not. I know personally I'd rather a guy say he can't handle it, than to continue in the relationship. The amazing thing is that often we THINK we can't handle a situation but once put into it we may find that we have more inner strength than we knew we had. Sorry for the long response... this is just one subject that I am familiar with since I deal with a special needs child every day of my life. There have been days where I KNOW I've done the right thing when he wraps his little arms around my neck and says I love you. It's a life long commitment and I don't know if Noah will ever leave home. He's four years old and we are still working on potty training. I'm required to be very patient because Noah doesn't always understand and I have to remind him to use his words instead of scratching or throwing things. It's not as easy as some people think, but it's rewarding to me. Noah has certainly been my teacher in many ways and I love him IMMENSELY. The key is that you have to be willing to give up things sometimes to gain other things, and when Noah shines.... so does my heart.

My son is ADD/ADHD and 40% Autistic and i live with my mother. Alot of women i have met on here say they cannot or would not due to the fact thats a big challenge. He needs alot of attention and he means the world to me. I just tell them just to move on and good luck. Life is full of challenges and i live life one day at a time hoping to find someone that would love him as if they were his own. I had one woman, i was at her house having dinner and my son had an eppisode and she yelled at him from the top of her lungs. I got my son and left and i told her never to call me again. No one yells at him like that. EVER!! I was friken pissed. No one understands Autism. If you do, send me a message and give me your opinion. P.S. Sorry for the length

The right person will come along..don't give up!

I appologize for what I said, my mistake, I thought you were taking about a woman. You are a fantastic man to love your child the way you do. You will find someone someday that feels the same way you do. Don't give up, she's out there waiting for you. Again I'm sorry I misunderstood.

Dont worry i'll never give up and its ok to misunderstand. I didnt take it in a bad way. Thanks for the feed back. 1 day at a time is how my son and i live. 1 thing about my son. He friken loves video games and bike rides and just being himself. We do alot of activities together. Sometimes i fell like putting a leash on him cause hes just all about go go go . I dont though cause i think it cruel. I just keep him within reaching distance. He makes me mad sometimes and comes back with a big hug and says " I LOVE U PAPI"

Thank you. You are a sweet heart.

Thank you That really throws you off balance when they come back and do that. That's what unconditional love is all about. You have a nice day.

Awwww! I have a girlfriend with a down syndrome son, and know there are times she struggles with situations. You need a patient, caring lady for sure. But isn't that what you would want anyway? In my mind your child is forcing you to ignore all the nonsense you might otherwise be dating out there and go straight for the gold. It may not feel like it now, but you have a blessing in disguise if you ask me. God Bless!

Thank you. God has blessed me and given me a challenge and a challenge i have accepted. I know there is a true, real, God fearing woman out there that knows what life is all about. Take care and may God bless you.

(((Papi))), I understand the challenges you live with daily. I have worked with special needs (physically & mentally disabled), children for the last 9 yrs. And 2 of my 4 own children, (who are all now adults), were diagnoised with ADHD when they were in the 2nd grade.

I use to think the leash for a child was cruel also...until I had twin sons!!! But I too never used them. Good tool though for crowded public places...like a busy airport or mall!

The woman you are in search of will come to you and your son in time...she will love you and your son dispite his disabilities and have a heart bigger than all get out!

I do believe that God doesn't give us more than we can handle and also that there is someone for everyone. So I have to believe you will find someone special for you and your child both.

I HAVE A 6 YR OLD WITH ASBERGERS AND ADHD AND MANY FOOD ALLERGIES.HIS MOTHER AND I SHARE ALL RESPONSIBILITIES WITH HIM.I WAS VERY SCARED WHEN WE FOUND OUT,WE ALL WANT THE BEST FOR OUR KIDS.WHAT A BLESSING HE IS. SO SMART AND FUNNY!! YOURE RIGHT ,SOME FOLKS JUST DONT UNDERSTAND,BUT ANYONE THAT HAS MET MY SON, FALLS IN LOVE WITH HIM. ITS GONNA TAKE A SPECIAL PERSON TO BE WITH YOU. KEEP YOUR CHIN UP.THATS WHAT I DO IN HOPE THAT PERSON WILL COME ALONG

I want to thank all the women and men for all the love and support you have given me on this subject. I hope to hear more from more people out there and maybe we can spread the word out that Autism isnt contagious but can be arrested at some point and recovery is then possible. I'm looking forward to hearing from more people. Gods blessings