A Blonde's Year in Review January - Took new scarf back to store because
it was too tight. February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to
print labels.....Helllloooo!!!.....bottles won't fit in printer!!! March
- Got really excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months.....box said
"2-4 years!" April - Trapped on escalator for hours ... power went
out!!! May - Tried to make Kool-Aid.....wrong instructions....8 cups of
water won't fit into those little packets!!! June - Tried to go water
skiing.....couldn't find a lake with a slope. July - Lost breast stroke
swimming competition....learned later, the other swimmers cheated, they
used their arms!!! August - Got locked out of my car in rain
storm.....car swamped because soft-top was open. September - The capital
of California is "C".....isn't it??? October - Hate M & M's....they are
so hard to peel. November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days…
instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!! December - Couldn't
call 911… "Duh".....there's no "eleven" button on the stupid
phone!!!

belly is hurting now