Topic: LEISURE JOHNNY'S BAR
tim20721's photo
Wed 06/04/08 08:51 PM

using again as I was no official when I did before...



Once upon a time in a land far away,
a beautiful, independent, self-assured princess
happened upon a frog as she sat contemplating
ecological issues on the shores of an unpolluted pond
in a verdant meadow near her castle. The frog hopped
into the princess' lap and said: " Elegant Lady,
I was once a handsome prince, until an evil witch
cast a spell upon me. One kiss from you, however,
and I will turn back into the dapper, young prince
that I am and then, my sweet, we can marry and set up housekeeping in your castle with my mother, where you can prepare my meals,clean my clothes, bear my children,
and forever feel grateful and happy doing so. "
That night, as the princess dined sumptuously
on lightly sauteed frog legs, seasoned in a white wine
and onion cream sauce, she chuckled and thought to herself:


I Don't Freakin Think So.


laugh
thats good

feralcatlady's photo
Wed 06/04/08 08:57 PM
laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh my favorite fairy tale....gigglesnort

tim20721's photo
Wed 06/04/08 09:07 PM
i think most everyone has run off for the night

IndnPrncs's photo
Wed 06/04/08 09:09 PM
I'm peeking in, very tired... ohwell

no photo
Wed 06/04/08 09:14 PM
smokin ohwell

IndnPrncs's photo
Wed 06/04/08 10:07 PM

smokin ohwell


(((Ramone))) are you playing?

ladyliz1417's photo
Thu 06/05/08 04:29 AM
oh shoot! This place doesnt open for another couple hoursohwell

no photo
Thu 06/05/08 05:01 AM
Edited by smiless on Thu 06/05/08 05:01 AM
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SINFUL CITY NEWS TRIBUNE

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LEISURE SUITS JOHNNY’S SONS JOKE:

Little Johnny goes to school, and the teacher says, 'Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?'

Little Johnny waves his hand, 'Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!'

Miss Rogers:'All right, little Johnny, what is your multi-syllable word?'

Little Johnny says, 'Mas-tur-bate.'

Miss Rogers smiles and says, 'Wow, little Johnny, that's a mouthful.'

Little Johnny says, 'No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob".

EVENT OF THE DAY:

A dog was found humping a street lamp in below 0 degrees. Police are trying to help the poor dog who somehow got stuck on it off.

HOROSCOPE:

MEN: When in your control, idle talk turns into a rambling tale. Overreaching for something you want could leave you feeling extremely exhausted. You must find another way to obtain it. Attend to a pressing need that has already been put off for much too long.

Romance: Fair | Finance: Fair | Health: Fair

Lucky Numbers: 28, 31, 35, 44

WOMEN: As far as you're concerned, anything worth doing is worth doing correctly. Your expectations are starting to become unrealistic. Strive for something you know is within your reach. Rewards are coming your way, but you must remain patient.

Romance: Fair | Finance: Good | Health: Good

Lucky Numbers: 17, 42, 58, 59

FLIRT OF THE DAY:

Explain your most embarrassing date ever on the forum. Gain an additional 10 flirt points for this. Make sure it is at least 20 words long the story. If you have done this then keep in mind you have 35 flirt points today instead of 25 to give away to your crush or someone.


tearsofblood666's photo
Thu 06/05/08 06:32 AM
wakey wakey sleepy heads
bob is in da house

faithhopelove's photo
Thu 06/05/08 06:38 AM
Knowing that it was still 9 in the am MmmGir walked in to the bar, because she knew this place well she felt confident this morning that she would not bump into anything but she did the stupid door was in the way again. lucky she landed right at the bar. She orders her usual Malibu and pineapple to sooth her soul. and tell the bar tender this joke
A pirate was talking to a "land-lubber" in a bar. The land-lubber noticed that, like any self-respecting pirate, this guy had a peg leg, a hook in place of one of his hands, and a patch over one eye. The land-lubber just had to find out how the pirate got in such bad shape. He asked the pirate, "How did you lose your leg?"

The pirate responded, "I lost me leg in a battle off the coast of Jamaica!" His new acquaintance was still curious so he asked, "What about you hand. Did you lose it at the same time?"

"No," answered the pirate. "I lost it to the sharks off the Florida Keys." Finally, the land-lubber asked, "I notice you also have an eye patch. How did you lose your eye?"

The pirate answered, "I was sleeping on a beach when a seagull flew over and crapped right in me eye." The land-lubber asked: "How could a little seagull crap make you loose your eye?"

The pirate snapped, "It was the day after I got me hook!"

ZenofFun's photo
Thu 06/05/08 07:08 AM
Edited by ZenofFun on Thu 06/05/08 07:09 AM
"This bar needs some blueballz! Oh yes it does!" said the Smooth Shimmier that was Biggie, yes Blueballz Biggie. He hops over the bar deftly mixing himself a Black Russian.

"So how you doin ladies?" he said, as he moonwalked across the floor- he was the man with the big stinky feet, but the twinkle toes!

kitcat87's photo
Thu 06/05/08 07:12 AM
Morning everyone *falls flat on her butt*
nice moonwalk blue

feralcatlady's photo
Thu 06/05/08 07:16 AM
Edited by feralcatlady on Thu 06/05/08 07:16 AM
SeXy SyLvIa bats her eyelases at zenoffun and ask in her most seductive southern draw..."Can I have one of those too kind sir."
SyLvIa scopes out the bar looking for the smexy Johnny oh it would be nice to catch that smile so early in the morning. The thought makes her gigglesnort.

ZenofFun's photo
Thu 06/05/08 07:17 AM

Morning everyone *falls flat on her butt*
nice moonwalk blue


In a deft motion he catches the beautiful falling woman; twirling across the floor to end in a half embrace. "Ohh Lady, you Can MOOOOve! and what is your sexy name?"laugh

feralcatlady's photo
Thu 06/05/08 07:32 AM
most embarrassing date. Was the first date with husband.....Got a beautiful outfit for the date. Went to a fancy smancy restaurant and of course ordered lobster. It was a whole lobster instead of the tails. The first shot at opening the lobster, and yep you guessed it SmExY SyLvIa dumped the whole thing in my lap....The butter of course ruined the outfit. I was so embarrassed that I made him wait until right before they closed to leave.....

IamMewhoRU's photo
Thu 06/05/08 07:40 AM
:::::Big ballz babowski walks into the room::::::::::::

hmmmmm........A lot of familiar faces I see flowerforyou bigsmile drinker

feralcatlady's photo
Thu 06/05/08 07:51 AM
Hey IamMe how are ya?


Can SyLvIa tempt you with a drink? And maybe some conversation about the south.....gigglesnort

Amberdee29045's photo
Thu 06/05/08 09:23 AM
gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood afternoon everyone! sorry i'm late....have you the new stop and wipe workout........take five steps, wipe off the sweat, take 6 steps, wipe off the sweat......

I was somewhat reminded of the worst date of my life last night y'all....check this out.

My junior year of high school. Getting ready for prom night. Got the dress ready, my bag, my shoes.......MY HAIR WON'T COOPERATE...... I know right? It gets worse, I'm puttin on my stockings, the damn things won't stay up......what's a poor redneck girl to do? THANK GOD FOR DUCT TAPE. Okay, date picks me up (thank god dad behaves) and we go to the restaurant.....My steak was ordered medium well and it came back RAREsick .....so after finally getting my steak done right and getting to the prom an hour late, the worst thing imaginable to happen to a young woman on her prom happens.......even worse I wasn't prepared. Turns out that tiny purse couldn't hold a maxi anyway.......


And here's a little punny pun I heard on the way here..

He was a mediocre conductor of a mediocre orchestra. He had been having problems with the basses; they were the least professional of his musicians. It was the last performance of the season, Beethoven�s 9th Symphony, which required extra effort from the basses at the end. Earlier that evening, he found the basses celebrating one of their birthdays by passing a bottle around. As he was about to cue the basses, he knocked over his music stand. The sheet music scattered. As he stood in front of his orchestra, his worst fear was realized; it was the bottom of the 9th, no score and the basses were loaded.

no photo
Thu 06/05/08 09:42 AM
Edited by smiless on Thu 06/05/08 10:25 AM
A NEW STORYTELLER IS TAKING OVER THIS COMICAL DATING GAME!

Amberdee29045 - Amber

If you have any questions on how this game is run then she will serve you!

Have fun

Johnny!happy

dreamboat1974's photo
Mon 05/25/09 06:14 AM
hi john! this game sounds interesting. how do you play it?