While in New York,

The Pope decided to grant absolution to three sinners.

The first person to come up was Howard Stern.

The Pope asked, "What is your sin?"

"I've offended people all over America," noted the self-proclaimed, "King of All Media."

The Pope replied, "Kneel down. I'll bless you and grant you absolution."

Next was Bill Clinton.

"What is your sin?" asked the Pope.

Clinton said, "I cheated on my wife."

The Pope looked at him and said, "Kneel down, my son. I'll bless you and grant you absolution."

The Pope then asked a third sinner, "What is your name?"

"Monica Lewinsky," came her reply.

The Pope said, "Maybe you should remain standing."