Hillary Clinton

Species: Homo Sapien

Sub Species: Socialiastus Liberalatus Osmossi

Origin: While it is generally believed she was spawned from hell, this is a totally unsubstantiated rumor. It is known that she is a descendant of the Rodham branch of the Democraticus Nobrainus who wandered away at the time of creation. This creature first appeared on the public scene in the turmoil of the 60s and quite possibly fried what gray matter she possessed with psychedelic drugs which could account for her delusional state today.

Habitat: This particular animal has been extremely migratory in its public life. First appeared in a liberal college in the North East U.S. later migrating to the South for an extended stay in Arkansas and then moving North again with a near decade long stay in Washington D. C. before ending up in a very affluent neighborhood in New York, City. She now spends her time migrating between New York City and Washington, D. C. when not flying around the country promising the moon while trying to get her self elected President. She is often seen in the company of the poor and downtrodden but would rather eat a Blister Bug than actually touch one of them. She is most comfortable in the company of other rich females more liberal than her self and is probably the most uncomfortable when she has to be in close proximity to her spouse although no one could blame her for that.

Diet: From the looks of her butt and thighs it can be assumed the animal is well fed although one would assume from the appearance that her diet does not include as many vegetables as it should and probably contains more meat, pasta and potatoes, although she has her clothes carefully tailored to conceal this. The girl could definitely do with more treadmill and fewer éclairs. She may consume alcohol but only in moderation which is a very good thing because she is scary enough sober, there is no way in hell anyone would want to see her drunk. Pour a couple six packs in this chick and she would make the Medusa look like one of the Vestal Virgins.

Mating Call: None documented (see below)

Mating Habits: She has an off spring so it is obvious that she mated once, but it is highly unlikely that she made a habit of it. She is apparently monogamous, a trait not shared by her spouse.

Distress Call: She does not have one, while she causes great anguish and distress among many, there is no documented case of her ever having been in distress herself.

General Information: While very affable and pleasant in public, she is rumored to be meaner than a Grizzly Bear with a hangover and hemorrhoids in private. When cornered she is known to use the Cobra’s Tactics, a vicious venous bite first and ask why later. She is usually seen in front of large crowds leading he applause for herself. She also professes to possess the rare trait of being able to absorb life experiences by osmosis. She claims to have gained much experience from just being in the White House while her husband was the President. This causes one to wonder just what she was experiencing when her husband was getting a BJ from Monica in the Oval Office.

GO HILLARY GO

GO HILLARY GO

Very nice, she is the spawn of satan!