Two 90 year olds had been dating for a while, when the man told the woman, "Well, tonight's the night we have sex!"
And so they did.
As they are lying in bed afterward, the man thinks to himself, "My God, if I knew she was a virgin, I would have been much more gentle with her!"
And the woman was thinking to herself, "My God, if I knew the old geezer could actually get it up, I would have taken off my panty hose!"

There was this guy who always went out drinking with his friends. He would always come home very late. One night, while he was at the bar he told them his secret for being able to sneak in late.

"When I walk in the house, before the wife can say anything, I lay her down, take off her panties, and give her the best oral sex she's ever had, until she has such an orgasm that she falls into a deep sleep. Then, I wash up and go to bed. By morning, she is so pleased, she doesn't care what time I came home."

One of his friends thinks this is a great idea. So he stays out late, comes home, sneaks into the bedroom, gives his wife the best oral sex she's ever had, and goes to wash up. His wife walks into the bathroom, obviously upset that he's home so late.

"Hey, why aren't you sleeping?" he asks.

"I was, but I came in to tell you that we've got to sleep on the couch tonight, 'cause my mother is sleeping in our bedroom."

The husband leans over and asks his wife, "Do you remember the
first time we had sex together over fifty-five years ago?
We went behind this very tavern where you leaned against the
back fence and I made love to you." "Yes, she says, "I remember it well." "OK," he says, "How about taking a stroll around there again
and we can do it for old time's sake?" "Oh Charlie, you old devil,
that sounds like a crazy, but good idea!"

There's a police officer sitting in the next booth listening to all this,and having a chuckle to himself. He thinks, "I've got to see
these two old-timers having sex against a fence. I'll just keep an
eye on them so there's no trouble." So he follows them.

They walk haltingly along, leaning on each other for support aided
by walking sticks. Finally they get to the back of the tavern and
make their way to the fence.

The old lady lifts her skirt and the old man drops his trousers.
As she leans against the fence, the old man moves in. Suddenly
they erupt into the most furious sex that the watching policeman
has ever seen. This goes on for about ten minutes. Both are
making loud noises and moaning and screaming. Finally, they both collapse, panting on the ground.

The policeman is amazed. He thinks he has learned something
about life and old age that he didn't know. After about half an hour
of lying on the ground recovering, the old couple struggle to their
feet and put their clothes back on.

The Policeman, still watching thinks, this was truly amazing. He
thinks, I've got to ask them what their secret is.

As the couple passes, he says to them, "Excuse me, but that
was something else. You must've had a fantastic sex life together.
Is there some sort of secret to this?"

The old man says, "Fifty-five years ago that wasn't an electric fence."