you have to have a man around to have fun???? Its gonna be a long road in life for ya then doll

someone just posted an asshole thread...so if ya wait 5 minutes and check that, you mind find one in there

Soooooooooooooooo because they wont look at you or talk to you... that makes them assholes...

Let me hand you one that loves to verbally and mentally abuse ya...and i'll trade assholes with ya!!!!

1. Aspire to be Barbie - the ***** has everything.

2. If the shoe fits - buy them in every color.

3. Take life with a pinch of salt... A wedge of lime, and a shot of tequila.

4. In need of a support group? - Cocktail hour with the girls!

5. Go on the 30 day diet. (I'm on it and so far I've lost 15 days).

6. When life gets you down - just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.

7. Let your greatest fear be that there is no PMS and this is just your personality.

8. I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.

9. Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.

10. Don't get your knickers in a knot; it solves nothing and makes you walk funny.

11. When life gives you lemons in 2009 - turn it into lemonade then mix it with vodka.

12. Remember where ever there is a good looking; sweet, single or married man there is some woman tired of his bull****!

13. Keep your chin up, only the first 40 years of parenthood are the hardest.

14. If it has Tires or Testicles it's gonna give you trouble.

15. By the time a women realizes her mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks she's wrong.

That's why I dont wait by the phone..... If you're not there to answer, he may wonder who else you're out with and try harder to show you he cares...

If im here to talk fine...if not, he'll call back if "he's all that into me".

Stop sitting by the phone and live life deary!!!

I'm with you shoes... Im WAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY East coast!!!

Hiya Coco!!

I'm not here alot, but not seen you in a coons age!! How ya be?

Hi Keith... Welcome to the funny farm

{{{{ Val }}}}
I am here, have been off and on all day. Taking breaks from home work and house work to see if anyone here has posted something to make me laugh before I go insane!! Thankfully... I'm half way there any how

didja leave 'em under someones bed??

A city slicker shoots a duck out in the country. As he's retrieving it, a farmer walks up and stops him, claiming that since the duck is on his farm, it technically belongs to him. After minutes of arguing, the farmer proposes they settle the matter "country style."

"What's country style?" asks the city boy.

"Out here in the country," the farmer says, "when two fellers have a dispute, one feller kicks the other one in the balls as hard as he can. Then that feller, he kicks the first one as hard as he can. And so forth. Last man standin' wins the dispute."

Warily the city boy agrees and prepares himself. The farmer hauls off and kicks him in the groin with all his might. The city boy falls to the ground in the most intense pain he's ever felt, crying like a baby and coughing up blood. Finally he staggers to his feet and says, "All right, n-now it's–it's m-my turn."

The farmer grins. "Aw, hell, you win. Keep the duck."

Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant. While having a bite to eat, they talk about their moonshine operation.

Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. And, after a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress. One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, 'Kin ya swallar?'

The woman shakes her head no.

Then he asks, 'Kin ya breathe?'

The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no.

The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress, yanks down her drawers and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue. The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth. As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly back to his table.

His partner says, 'Ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver' but I ain't niver seed nobody do it!' .

soooooooooooooooooooooooo.... Do I get a Klondike bar???

STANDS UP AND TOOTS!!! "ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh sayyyyy can you seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee" without screach marks even!!!!

well.. Kill 'em with kindness girl!!!

Nobody backed her into a corner....

How ya been babycakes??????????????????

she just said she was hating people today

lmao!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hi cy!!! xoxoxoxoxoxoxox

how ironic... it seems you dislike haters..... "I got one thing to say to punk a$$es who hate,
Motherf*ckers don't know what,
You better watch what you say.



but yet... you "HATE" people?????