Community > Posts By > massachusetts
Topic:
You ever been...
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wheres mine!!!
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Jack woke up with a killer hangover after attending his firm's Party. He didn't even remember how he got home. It's 8.30. What day is it? Thursday. His wife must have gone to work. As he struggled into consciousness through the fog of a pounding headache, his stomach plummeted as he wondered what the hell he did last night. He forced himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he saw was a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a little vase of sweet peas, freshly picked from the garden. He sat up. The bedroom was clean and tidy, - there was no trail of drunkenly abandoned clothes, fresh air was coming in through the window and all was serene. He stumbled to the bathroom, also pristine, and, squinting gingerly into the mirror, saw that he had a black eye. This was not a good sign, but no memories were returning. As he concentrated hard on getting the world into focus, he saw a post-it note stuck on the corner of the mirror. It was written in red, with little hearts on it and a kiss from his wife. “I'll ring your office and tell them you won't be in today. Breakfast is in the oven. Try to eat something and go back to bed for the morning. There's snooker on TV this afternoon. Take it easy today, hope your eye doesn't hurt too much. See you tonight. I love you, darling! Love, Jillian. X” He stumbled to the kitchen and sure enough, there was hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the newspaper. His teenaged son was sitting at the table, eating. Jack, bracing himself, asked his son what happened the previous night. “Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.” Confused, he asked his son, “So, why is everything in such perfect order, aspirins by the bed, a nice note from Mum and breakfast waiting for me?” His son replied, “Oh THAT!... Mum dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your trousers off, you screamed, 'Leave me alone you slapper,I'm married!!” Broken Coffee Table $250 Hot Breakfast $3.50, Two Aspirins 20c Saying the right thing, at the right time......PRICELESS Priceless |
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nice plane
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Topic:
Who would be the
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pillsbury doughboy
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Topic:
watcha listening to
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smokin boston
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Topic:
watcha listening to
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I wear my sunglasses at night
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Topic:
watcha listening to
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right now roxette-joyride Thanks for making interested in listening to that lol |
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take off your prosthetic nose ?
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...Noway! Having an infection of sorts that would produce massive amounts of snot would be the worst. There is no getting away from a booger |
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show off your dungeon full of sex toys yeah that would do it |
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Topic:
What would you do if you
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where does it hurt?
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Topic:
THOUGHTS OF A MAN
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any australians online??
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Topic:
The Why's ( ? ) of men
Edited by
massachusetts
on
Sun 08/31/08 09:38 PM
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Whats your favorite? if not all lol
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Topic:
Hi I'm Lisa
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HELLO bizzy bee have a lot of fun!
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Topic:
Come on......
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Its like new years eve for the new mingle
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Topic:
awwww....
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Starkle, starkle, little twink, Who the hell you are I think. I’m not under what they call The alcofluence of incohol. I’m not drunk as thinkle peep, I’m just a little slort of sheep. Tee martoonis make a guy Fool so feelish, don’t know why. Rally don’t know who’s me yet The drunker I stay the longer I get So just one more to full my cup, I’ve all day sober to Sunday up! WTF !!!! great |
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Topic:
awwww....
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Is that a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in you hahahahahhah |
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Topic:
help!
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Dude! I'm eating here!!! lol |
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Topic:
did you know
Edited by
massachusetts
on
Sun 08/31/08 07:20 PM
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Wow learn something new every day thanks. they have this horrible statue in the boston park look it up where the ppl in battle are all dead and tied straight up with a pole on thier horses and they are walking back to thier camp. The poor guy who lived across the street from it well this is my assumption lit his house on fire so he could move but it is a really creepy statue.
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Topic:
randomness
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lasagna!!!!!
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