Topic: In the earliest stages of dating someone, Call or Vid Chat,
no photo
Fri 09/01/23 06:24 PM
One thing I've noticed that is so against my instinct is that no one, and I mean NO ONE wants to take the extra step and have a actual verbal phone call or video chat as part of the getting to know you process. Imagine their surprise when I had the tenacity to get a beer at noon...they would have known that if they had asked me

My point is that it is crucial to give yourself every opportunity to not just text a question about you. More interactivty is key.

I was asked by 5 different ppl over 2 days "what am i on this site for?" And i found myseld copypasting the same response to an old email from last yeae during another online date. Now that, to me, is not going to be at his best. In anyway in his life.

But that is a question with a complex enough answer to let him rest his thumps for awhile.

motowndowntown's photo
Fri 09/01/23 07:09 PM
Yes people do actually take the step of making phone or video calls. But only after getting to know some one is not a typical scammer who asks to go off-site after only one or two messages.

And that "what are you looking for here?" question is typical scammer talk so they can tailor their responses to you..

Morticia's photo
Fri 09/01/23 07:27 PM
I usually answer "I'm looking to waste everyone's time here" if they ask me that question lol.


Mr Good Guy's photo
Fri 09/01/23 07:33 PM
Agree. Those "what are you looking for here" are all scammers. It's such a generic question and in the RARE occurrence a real life woman uses that within the first message or two, she's just wasting your time anyway. Don't reply and just move on.

You'll see the pattern the scammers use here if you are not desperate enough to run offline to where they tell you to go so quickly. I won't name all the scammers methods but they are very, very, easy to spot.

Also, no need to go off the site at first (i.e..google chat, etc). I hear tons of guys saying they are getting asked for money. I've been here for a couple years and almost never get those. Ever. The only reason I think I don't get those $ reqests is that I don't rush off to these offline methods of communicating. Why would you so quickly when you can chat right here? When you rush off the site elsewhere as they request, you are pegged as an easy target, which, quite frankly, you are if you do so.


Rock's photo
Fri 09/01/23 08:34 PM
I don't mind no vid.
I won't under any circumstances vid with
anyone I've never met in person.

However, there comes a time, to at least here
there other person's voice.
If that doesn't happen on the day it's agreed to,
I'll end all communication right there.

no photo
Fri 09/01/23 11:46 PM
One thing I've noticed that is so against my instinct is that no one, and I mean NO ONE wants to take the extra step and have a actual verbal phone call or video chat as part of the getting to know you process. Imagine their surprise when I had the tenacity to get a beer at noon...they would have known that if they had asked me

My point is that it is crucial to give yourself every opportunity to not just text a question about you. More interactivty is key.

I was asked by 5 different ppl over 2 days "what am i on this site for?" And i found myseld copypasting the same response to an old email from last yeae during another online date. Now that, to me, is not going to be at his best. In anyway in his life.

But that is a question with a complex enough answer to let him rest his thumps for awhile.

Better would if you been to the cafeteria or any social gathering avenue and directly asked a partner for direct board of marriage on stage an signed the wedding agreement plate...
3D mutual aspect

Mexicolove's photo
Fri 09/01/23 11:52 PM
If they don't want to video call I block them, most probably scammers

Dramatic Muffin's photo
Sat 09/02/23 01:54 AM
Edited by Dramatic Muffin on Sat 09/02/23 01:55 AM
I agree with Mr. Good Guy that those were probably all scammers. Don't waste your time with messages that generic.

Everyone has their comfort level. I have never been willing to jump straight to phone calls or video chat until I've gotten to know them first through the platform's messaging feature. But once both of us do reach that comfort level, I'd rather go straight to video chat.

Shivam's photo
Sat 09/02/23 02:25 AM
I m looking for serious relationship. Is any girl interested??