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| Topic: Dating | |
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Has anyone else felt at times that it is just to much effort when it comes to finding that person you want to spend the rest of your life with, lately dating is becoming more and more of an effort, however I have made some great friends along the way, starting to feel like maybe friendship is enough for me at this point in my life, some with benefits of coarse, but still I do miss the closeness of being in committed relationship,but then I start thinking of all the time and effort involved and it makes me just feel tired, maybe I am just getting old, you would think woman around my age wouldn't be playing all these mind games, but some do, not all of them, but I do take some responsibility for my situation, seems I am always winding up in relationships with partners who have a lot of emotional issues, these relationships have never been healthy, it's about to happen to me again,a woman that I currently work with fits this description, but I think I am starting to fall for her and her for me. I don't usually believe in love at first sight, but I can't get the image of this woman out of my head. I know I am already hooked, by the way we are both single, I am really into this woman and part of my brain keeps telling me to run not walk from this woman, any advice would be greatly appreciated.
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The only advice that I have is to follow your intuition your gut instinct there is a reason for the red flags always follow your intuition no matter what and there really is nice people out there you just need to wade throught the players
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Edited by
justme659
on
Fri 04/30/10 06:06 PM
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If you see that she has "red flags" already, you already know the answer. But sometimes a person needs advice from an unbiased third party. RUN!! Do not pass go, do not collect nookie. Yes, I said it. Listen, if you truly think you have feelings for this woman, and want to make a go of it, OK. But go at this S L O W...snail slow. And get that thought out of your head that you have to hurry through the courting process because you are not 20 anymore. ( I am just guessing here.) A good/great relationship takes time and work. So if you are not willing or ready to put your all in to it, step away from the bunny. AND...work relationships are double trouble, you know if things do not work out you are stuck dealing with a woman that you are no longer talking to. Think twice, three time and then think again before you move on your feelings. Good Luck.
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don't let loneliness drag you by your nose. Love is like a crocodile. If you do not approach the water of love carefully that crocodile will eat you!
Go slow like justme said. 
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First of all, dating is a process dude. I mean, if it was simple as picking a chick out of 100, and then having that one chick being "the one", then none of us would be on Mingle or would be out dating. Of course it is normal to get frustrated. I mean, when we know what we want to find but it seems so hard to find it, one will become discouraged. It doesn't mean that when you think that you might be into a girl that she could be the one, or that you are falling for her. Remember, feelings can be misleading and you have to really search within yourself to know if you have, in fact, found the person you want to be with.
Which leads me to your current situation. If there are red flags, and you already can tell that this could be a situation that you would want to avoid, then you must stop and ask yourself "Why do I think I am falling for her? Is it just lonliness? I am just hoping she will be what I think she could be?". When we are lonely, our feelings can trick us. We don't want to believe they can, but they do. Hey, it happens. We are human. I say this because you are a searcher and you truly want to find a woman to be with. I don't care if you are liking the FWB and all. Finding a woman to be with, to share things with....no matter how dudes wanna spin it....when you find a chick like that, you will gladly give the FWB's up. One woman, especially THE one woman makes all the difference. Alot of women don't realize this about dudes, but it is true. Deep down, us guys do want someone in our lives that helps add to it. I believe that since you see the red flags that you already have your answer. And trust me, I know how it feels to be in the dating game. But I also know what I want, and I also know that in order to have that, that dating is something I have to do. But in the end, when you do find that chick who (and this sounds corny) "complete's you", you will look back and be thankful that you went through all this dating. And hey...you never know where you will meet her. But trust me. When you do, something about her will be different. A good different. And, she will know it to. But meh, Goof is done being mushy. Peace out girl scout! |
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First of all, dating is a process dude. I mean, if it was simple as picking a chick out of 100, and then having that one chick being "the one", then none of us would be on Mingle or would be out dating. Of course it is normal to get frustrated. I mean, when we know what we want to find but it seems so hard to find it, one will become discouraged. It doesn't mean that when you think that you might be into a girl that she could be the one, or that you are falling for her. Remember, feelings can be misleading and you have to really search within yourself to know if you have, in fact, found the person you want to be with. Which leads me to your current situation. If there are red flags, and you already can tell that this could be a situation that you would want to avoid, then you must stop and ask yourself "Why do I think I am falling for her? Is it just lonliness? I am just hoping she will be what I think she could be?". When we are lonely, our feelings can trick us. We don't want to believe they can, but they do. Hey, it happens. We are human. I say this because you are a searcher and you truly want to find a woman to be with. I don't care if you are liking the FWB and all. Finding a woman to be with, to share things with....no matter how dudes wanna spin it....when you find a chick like that, you will gladly give the FWB's up. One woman, especially THE one woman makes all the difference. Alot of women don't realize this about dudes, but it is true. Deep down, us guys do want someone in our lives that helps add to it. I believe that since you see the red flags that you already have your answer. And trust me, I know how it feels to be in the dating game. But I also know what I want, and I also know that in order to have that, that dating is something I have to do. But in the end, when you do find that chick who (and this sounds corny) "complete's you", you will look back and be thankful that you went through all this dating. And hey...you never know where you will meet her. But trust me. When you do, something about her will be different. A good different. And, she will know it to. But meh, Goof is done being mushy. Peace out girl scout!  Not to mention that it is great advice It's nice to see the "softer side" of Goof! |
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Dating should be nothing but fun !!!
It's not an interview for a potential life partner what if we do live till the end without a partner? SO WHAT!! You should make the life you live satisying enough so that having a "partner" isn't the beggining and the end! If I were to die today---- my having a partner does not matter to me at all I have my family. I have freinds. I have me I am  complete!!!! |
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First of all, dating is a process dude. I mean, if it was simple as picking a chick out of 100, and then having that one chick being "the one", then none of us would be on Mingle or would be out dating. Of course it is normal to get frustrated. I mean, when we know what we want to find but it seems so hard to find it, one will become discouraged. It doesn't mean that when you think that you might be into a girl that she could be the one, or that you are falling for her. Remember, feelings can be misleading and you have to really search within yourself to know if you have, in fact, found the person you want to be with. Which leads me to your current situation. If there are red flags, and you already can tell that this could be a situation that you would want to avoid, then you must stop and ask yourself "Why do I think I am falling for her? Is it just lonliness? I am just hoping she will be what I think she could be?". When we are lonely, our feelings can trick us. We don't want to believe they can, but they do. Hey, it happens. We are human. I say this because you are a searcher and you truly want to find a woman to be with. I don't care if you are liking the FWB and all. Finding a woman to be with, to share things with....no matter how dudes wanna spin it....when you find a chick like that, you will gladly give the FWB's up. One woman, especially THE one woman makes all the difference. Alot of women don't realize this about dudes, but it is true. Deep down, us guys do want someone in our lives that helps add to it. I believe that since you see the red flags that you already have your answer. And trust me, I know how it feels to be in the dating game. But I also know what I want, and I also know that in order to have that, that dating is something I have to do. But in the end, when you do find that chick who (and this sounds corny) "complete's you", you will look back and be thankful that you went through all this dating. And hey...you never know where you will meet her. But trust me. When you do, something about her will be different. A good different. And, she will know it to. But meh, Goof is done being mushy. Peace out girl scout! Not to mention that it is great advice It's nice to see the "softer side" of Goof! Bleh. Goof no like it! 
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Take one day at a time, don't ignore gut feelings but don't think that all is out to get what they want and then take off..
I also assure you that some of the men around our ages play the same games as well...........  But one must tread carefully but never forget to have fun on the way...... |
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There is no understanding the psychology of dating or why people lose interest. I have lost interest when it was too easy and I didn't have to work very hard in the relationship. When I was younger, I liked a challenge. Usually, in a relationship, one person works harder and gives more emotionally than the other. One reason might be that the person was not as you or they thought. As time goes by, you learn more about an individual and that can lead to disenchantment. You know the old saying, "you never really know someone until you live with them."
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First of all, dating is a process dude. I mean, if it was simple as picking a chick out of 100, and then having that one chick being "the one", then none of us would be on Mingle or would be out dating. Of course it is normal to get frustrated. I mean, when we know what we want to find but it seems so hard to find it, one will become discouraged. It doesn't mean that when you think that you might be into a girl that she could be the one, or that you are falling for her. Remember, feelings can be misleading and you have to really search within yourself to know if you have, in fact, found the person you want to be with. Which leads me to your current situation. If there are red flags, and you already can tell that this could be a situation that you would want to avoid, then you must stop and ask yourself "Why do I think I am falling for her? Is it just lonliness? I am just hoping she will be what I think she could be?". When we are lonely, our feelings can trick us. We don't want to believe they can, but they do. Hey, it happens. We are human. I say this because you are a searcher and you truly want to find a woman to be with. I don't care if you are liking the FWB and all. Finding a woman to be with, to share things with....no matter how dudes wanna spin it....when you find a chick like that, you will gladly give the FWB's up. One woman, especially THE one woman makes all the difference. Alot of women don't realize this about dudes, but it is true. Deep down, us guys do want someone in our lives that helps add to it. I believe that since you see the red flags that you already have your answer. And trust me, I know how it feels to be in the dating game. But I also know what I want, and I also know that in order to have that, that dating is something I have to do. But in the end, when you do find that chick who (and this sounds corny) "complete's you", you will look back and be thankful that you went through all this dating. And hey...you never know where you will meet her. But trust me. When you do, something about her will be different. A good different. And, she will know it to. But meh, Goof is done being mushy. Peace out girl scout! Not to mention that it is great advice It's nice to see the "softer side" of Goof! Bleh. Goof no like it! Awwwww. You really are a metrosexual. 
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First of all, dating is a process dude. I mean, if it was simple as picking a chick out of 100, and then having that one chick being "the one", then none of us would be on Mingle or would be out dating. Of course it is normal to get frustrated. I mean, when we know what we want to find but it seems so hard to find it, one will become discouraged. It doesn't mean that when you think that you might be into a girl that she could be the one, or that you are falling for her. Remember, feelings can be misleading and you have to really search within yourself to know if you have, in fact, found the person you want to be with. Which leads me to your current situation. If there are red flags, and you already can tell that this could be a situation that you would want to avoid, then you must stop and ask yourself "Why do I think I am falling for her? Is it just lonliness? I am just hoping she will be what I think she could be?". When we are lonely, our feelings can trick us. We don't want to believe they can, but they do. Hey, it happens. We are human. I say this because you are a searcher and you truly want to find a woman to be with. I don't care if you are liking the FWB and all. Finding a woman to be with, to share things with....no matter how dudes wanna spin it....when you find a chick like that, you will gladly give the FWB's up. One woman, especially THE one woman makes all the difference. Alot of women don't realize this about dudes, but it is true. Deep down, us guys do want someone in our lives that helps add to it. I believe that since you see the red flags that you already have your answer. And trust me, I know how it feels to be in the dating game. But I also know what I want, and I also know that in order to have that, that dating is something I have to do. But in the end, when you do find that chick who (and this sounds corny) "complete's you", you will look back and be thankful that you went through all this dating. And hey...you never know where you will meet her. But trust me. When you do, something about her will be different. A good different. And, she will know it to. But meh, Goof is done being mushy. Peace out girl scout! Not to mention that it is great advice It's nice to see the "softer side" of Goof! Bleh. Goof no like it! Awwwww. You really are a metrosexual. I'm complicated Chrissy. 
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